Awaken!

Come across to my new site!

2010-09-24T11:07:00.004+10:00

Come visit me across at www.awakenkinesiology.com/blog!

Add this address to your reader: http://feeds.feedburner.com/awakenkinesiologycom

You can also find me at www.nadineandkerry.com.

Kerry xx

Compose your Life

2010-08-17T10:19:00.002+10:00

Nadine and I are so excited to announce our next event! Spend a day composing your life with us. Sunday 12th September in Middle Park!

More details at my new site: www.awakenkinesiology.com and at our new joint site: www.nadineandkerry.com. Pop across and say hi! xx

This blog has moved!

2010-08-09T19:23:00.001+10:00

I'm now blogging over at my *new site* at http://awakenkinesiology.com

Do come visit, you can subscribe to my new blog over there!

Hugs, Kerry x

Saying no

2010-08-06T19:25:00.003+10:00

So I am still doing my little tarot course with this lovely lady. Such a lovely way to spend an evening. Back a few weeks ago we learnt a really simple little spread, just two cards;

What do I need to let go of
What do I need to allow in

I can't remember what I needed to allow in but for the what do I need to let go of, I got the Eight of Wands. It's a really nice card to have come up in a spread, it refers to lots of possibilities and opportunities and choices. Nice, of course, if you have time. Oh, and energy.

With our impending wedding (in October!), my business, the work Nadine and I are doing, writing, the other education-related bits of work I do each week, seeing friends, spending time with my fiance and everything else, I'm kind of at the limit of what I can physically do.

Like the card said, I'm having to let go of opportunities.

It is hard!

I like saying yes to things. I like that feeling of possibility, newness. Sometimes too, I must admit, pleasing others. These days, because I work for myself, saying yes is often related to additional income.

Also? The weddings are an outrageous expense thing? Not a myth.

But I've had to start saying no.

I'm having to really discern what is the best use of my time. I have to look after my energy. Noone gives me sick leave these days. I need to keep myself well, for a start. I can't afford to burn out.

I need to focus on what is most important, for me, and for us, at this time.

To trust.

There is enough.

Enough time, enough money, enough energy.

Even when I say no, there is enough.

Wedding dress fittings, selecting ceremony music with our organist, buying shoes, organising and printing invites, choosing wedding bands, liaising with my bridesmaids and their dressmaker in South Australia about their dresses, booking honeymoon accommodation ... these are some of the things I've done in the past week.

It's all fun stuff, that we will never do again.

There's a lot more of it to go!

We are pretty decisive and clear, so the process has been easy and flowy.

There's just a lot of stuff.

But it doesn't have to be hard. It can be light, if I let it. If I let some of the other, less necessary stuff go. If I'm gentle with myself as I do it.

Understanding, compassionate, caring. To myself.

I am going to enjoy the next ten weeks.

And if that means letting some other opportunities fly on by in the meantime, so be it.

They'll be back.

Giving away your power

2010-07-23T17:41:00.007+10:00

Often when I'm working with clients particular themes come through over a period of days or weeks. Even though the specifics are different, there are strong similarities.

When that happens I know I need to *pay attention* because there's something for me to learn and understand ... and sometimes to share with you.

There are several themes weaving their way through my practice at the moment but the one I want to talk about now is giving away your power.

What does giving away your power mean to you?

Do you have a sense of having power?

Does the word have a positive or negative feeling to you?

Most of us don't really think a lot about having power and what that means. And meanwhile give away our power all the time.

So what am I talking about here?

Giving away your power can be things like ...

worrying about what other people think
spending time with people who drain your energy or make you feel bad about yourself
putting the needs of others before your own and then resenting it
repeatedly putting yourself in situations that make you feel unhappy
deciding you have no control over certain situations and feeling helpless
letting your work take over your life and stop you looking after yourself
thinking you have no choice but to feel a certain way because *insert reason*
feeling like you need to explain or justify yourself to do what's best for you

Do you do any of these things?

Often the realisation we are giving away our power is powerful in itself.

We've often never even thought about it.

Why would I do that, we wonder, that will never work!

If you're doing one or more of these things, it might just be a matter of becoming aware ... and choosing differently in the future. It's often just a mental shift.

So, what might taking your power back mean?

It will be different for everyone ... these are the kinds of things that it has meant for clients lately. See if anything stands out for you:

Taking responsibility for how you feel within yourself. Making decisions that feel good for you. Doing your own thing and not worrying what others think. Putting your needs first so that when you do need to be there for others, you can feel good about it, rather than resentful.

Taking control of your attitude to your situation. Calmly standing your ground when people are aggressive or rude to you and realising it's probably to do with them and not you.

Spending time with people who support you ... and being supportive of yourself when this is not possible, for example, in a difficult work environment. Spending some time alone if you need it. Doing things that nurture you. Being gentle with yourself.

Choosing to love and accept yourself regardless of what's going on around you.

The shift

It has been interesting to see that once clients have worked on this ... the situation or the people around them don't necessarily change ... but their whole perspective does. When they come back for their next session and I ask how it's all going, there's a major shift.

"Oh I decided not to spend time with that person/those people for now, it just doesn't make me feel good"

"I've been more confident and clear at work and people seem to realise I mean it and everything is going more smoothly"

"I've just been focusing on what I need to do and I haven't even been thinking about what other people think"

"It hasn't really changed but it doesn't seem to bother me anymore, I feel in control"

It doesn't have to be hard

The interesting thing my clients have been saying is that when they take back their power, there is rarely the resistance from other people, work or whatever it was they imagined was holding them back.

When we shift, it all shifts.

Most of the time, there doesn't even seem to be comment, let alone the conflict or confrontation they may have initially feared. This is probably because some of the emotion has been defused. Taking back your power is not an act of anger or force. It doesn't have to be hard. It can be easy. Gentle.

It's a Sovereignty thing

Havi calls this kind of thing Sovereignty and defines it like this:

“the spiritual quality of not giving a shit.”
“the state of not giving a damn what people think because you are the king or queen of your life.”
“being at home in your body and your life.”
“knowing that you are only responsible for your stuff, not for anyone else’s.”

What do power or sovereignty mean for you at the moment? Do share!

Image: by d3b...*

Opening to possibility

2010-07-18T18:19:00.007+10:00

When you study something like Kinesiology every second weekend over a period of three years you get to know the other people you're studying with rather well.

There tends to be lots of discussions about future possibilities and it was about two years ago that a friend in my course told me she thought I'd teach yoga one day. This lady is very intuitive but on this point, I knew she was wrong.

First of all, I didn't want to. I wasn't even attending regular classes due to study induced busyness and exhaustion. And the prospect of devoting even more time and more money towards study was highly unappealing.

"You won't have to study yoga teaching," she told me.

Ha, well that was ridiculous. Everyone knows that if you want to teach yoga you need to do a yoga teacher training course.

In any case, teaching was the last thing from my mind. I had just left primary teaching behind me, thank you very much. The thought of teaching anything again made me feel quite anxious. Although I'd quite liked teaching and knew I was quite good at it, I was completely over it. So many people to please, so much work to do, so much structure, always feeling guilty because I should be doing more, more, more.

"It will start in February."

Despite my resistance, the friend kept bringing it up. She started to mention workshops.

"They'll start out small but they'll get much bigger."

I doubted it. I couldn't imagine it and also, I didn't want to imagine it. What would I even run a workshop on? I had no idea.

Even though my job at the education dept involved me giving regular presentations to teachers, I didn't love public speaking. I'm naturally fairly shy and I was NOT looking to do more of it, especially not by choice. Really, it's not what I want to do, I assured her.

Also, stop bringing it up, I know it's not going to happen, can we talk about something else?

"They want you to know it will be easy. It will be different. You'll just know what to say. It will be fun. You'll feel like you do when you write on your blog."

Oh. I still doubted it were possible. But if it felt like that, it might be ok.

Of course, I probably needed all these hints along the way. Opportunities to look at my fears so that later, I might be ready. Reassurances that it might actually be enjoyable, if I chose to go down that path. If I hadn't needed these pieces of information, my friend probably never would have offered them.

We get the help we need.

You might imagine that when I met Nadine, about a year ago, that all the pieces quickly fell into place. You'd be wrong. Take this conversation that we had about our respective futures:

Kerry: Of course I love my Kinesiology so I'll be doing that. I might do some more yoga one day and who knows, maybe some workshops and writing but I don't know what about.

Nadine: Well I love my yoga so I'll be doing that. I'll definitely do some more writing and probably bigger workshops and retreats but I don't know what about.

Gosh girls, I hope you can figure it out!

So this year I finally made it to my first yoga class with Nadine - in February, when else?? After the class we went for coffee at Brother Buba Budan.

"Maybe we should do a workshop together on yoga and Kinesiology?" I suggested. We rang the Hub and booked it in, for July.

And so it began.

Finding the words

2010-07-12T19:15:00.011+10:00

A couple of days have passed since Nadine and I ran our first Unstuck workshop, and I'm still waiting for the words to arrive.

There was much anticipation and we got lovely feedback on the day and since. Nadine is processing too.

Powerful doesn't begin to describe it.

This has been one of the biggest parts of the process all along. Finding the words.

We work on different levels, the two of us, with our yoga and Kinesiology. But we are realising the words are the same. Words that can explain what we see and what we feel and what we know.

We already work with people who are going through enormous change. We learn, all the time, through them.

And as we go, we are finding the words to express the ways we work with and understand emotions and feelings and the process of change.

Luckily we work in tandem. "Nadine, I can't find my words," I will say. "Don't worry," she will tell me, "I have mine today." And then, it switches.

As we began to write the notes for our workshop, I kept seeing a quote. I didn't know the source but I'd seen it many places and it kept flashing up. I must write that down, I thought, I must remember to put that in. I got home and opened the notes that Nadine had started.

There was the quote, right at the top of the page:

'Don't ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come most alive, because what the world needs is people who have come alive.’ Howard Thurman

When we read through the notes now, we can't quite remember who wrote what. Our words, our ways of understanding this work are beginning to merge. And still changing.

Words that can articulate and explain the energies we work with and feel. Words that give us all permission to be fallible. Words that encourage exploration, that help you to remember what you know.

To really own all that you are.

The light and the dark, the awareness and the ignorance. To acknowledge and accept and love yourself exactly where you are. And from that point, to make choices.

We have had to do all this ourselves to create the work. Of course running the workshop itself brought up an even deeper layer of that. We feel raw too, slightly exposed. But grateful. And proud of ourselves too.

For having the courage to trust and be open to creating something that is new, to us. For being scared at times, and unsure. And then gently moving into and through our fears ... into the unknown.

And now after the workshop, there is the sense of a void.

A silence.

A waiting.

Integration time, we'll call it.

And then, the beginnings of a trickle. The mind and the body and the heart start to re-wire themselves with their new awareness and understanding.

Things start to flow.

As we keep being reminded as we do this work: It doesn’t have to be hard. It can be easy. Simple.

If you let it.

And just like that, the words return.

Image: by Pink Sherbet Photography

A new wardrobe ... for my business!

2010-07-07T10:13:00.007+10:00

I feel like I've just gone out and bought a whole new wardrobe for my business. After Leigh-ann created the gorgeous poster for the workshop Nadine and I are running this Saturday(!) I decided to get one for my business.

Even though I've been in business for eighteen months, it's only now that I'm creating proper offline advertising materials. And when I realise that I am perplexed. How did I ever think I would build a business in Kinesiology, which is something that many people have never heard of, in an almost exclusively online environment? I don't know.

Maybe I was saved by my own naivette, because I have, and I'm lucky to work with fabulous clients who are smart and funny and who also teach me an enormous amount.

I've also had *lots* of Kinesiology sessions on building my business and in reality, that is what has made the difference. Like everyone I have freak outs and fears and perceived limitations and I just have to keep working through them as they come up. Do the work, you get the results. That is my experience, anyway.

Back to the poster. Do you like it? Isn't it pretty! Leigh-ann is so clever and so easy to work with. Highly recommended and very reasonably priced. After she started the poster I realised that nothing would match this new item.

Although I hadn't planned on doing so, it seemed as good a time as any to re-do my visual image-y stuff because even though I love my original logos etc, my style has probably shifted a little. I flow with it all more now and the new design reflects that. So Leigh-ann ended up doing a bunch of other stuff for me too - a header, logo, a banner, a magnet design thing.

Pretty soon I'll be moving my website and blog together and it will all be beautifully flowing and fabulous. At the moment the logistics are hurting my brain a little but I will get there.

The work that Nadine and I are doing is creating so much change for us and we have so many exciting plans for the future. Would you believe we've already been approached about running workshops in both Adelaide and Canberra next year? Uh huh. It's extroadinary.

We are most impressed with the Universe. The process has had it's challenges though, mostly because it has brought lots of our own stuff to the surface, old stuff like being ok being visible, feeling good enough etc. Which is ok ... because once it comes to the surface it can be cleared.

Can't clear what you can't feel or don't realise is there!

Sisterly love

2010-07-04T15:22:00.007+10:00

Recently my sister wrote a lovely post about looking after yourself, prefaced rather amusingly with the words "I'm not the writer in the family". Hmmm. When I wrote the copy for my website, she was one of my main editors!

I asked her about her comment. She claimed she had picked up some writing tips from me. When pressed on what they might be, she said, "when in doubt, put a full stop." I'm sure THAT piece of wisdom - which of course I can't recall offering - makes all the difference!

It's not just one way though, my sister is the one who is good at all sports, running, acting and singing. And she is very organised. All things I shy away from. And I mention running when she probably hasn't run at all since school!

Isn't it interesting the way we make up our minds about what we are and are not good at.

I guess it is through our siblings that we first learn about who we are and who we are not in relation to others. Being "good" or "bad" at things seems so important and there are lots of ways to measure that - through grades, scores, results, games, events, races etc. Modes of comparison that mostly seem to fall away as you get older, and certainly become less relevant.

It is hard for me to even remember us competing or arguing as children, but I know we did. My sister can remember. When I told her I was writing about sibling rivarly, she suggested,

"Maybe mention that when the masking tape went down in the middle of the room, you got more space on your side because you got the doorway."

I've often heard it said that when looking for your passions to go back to your childhood as it was then that you were more likely to just do what you loved and what came naturally.

I suppose it is equally important to check in on whether you made any assumptions about yourself as a child that simply are not true anymore.

When working with clients I've also noticed it is quite common to hold onto old sibling patterns and rivalries. "Oh my sister was always the one who was good at art/ sport/ smarter/ prettier/ more popular."

Sometimes these beliefs are still holding the person back today. It can still be the reason why they won't, for example, draw or paint, even though they love it! And even though the comparison is no longer relevant.

It can also be true that the attention, time or energy that was devoted to this sibling as a result of whatever successes (or alternatively, issues) they may have had is still a source of resentment.

These days, I wouldn't regard my sister and I as competitive at all. It wouldn't even occur to me. Sometimes people tell me we're quite different. It's actually hard for me to say whether we are or not, I can't even really tell if we look alike.

We are very close and talk nearly every day, despite living in different states. She'll be my "matron" of honour later this year. She's funny, caring, loyal, strong and fabulous. And I love my sister to bits and pieces!

And yes, I've asked her to write for us again (when she's ready of course, new baby and all).

So, tell me about your sisterly or brotherly relationship! Any stories to share?

Image from Flickr: Sisters by mel e mo

How do you get around?

2010-06-28T18:15:00.008+10:00

How do you get around?

Mostly, I ride just about everywhere. We live close to the Melbourne CBD and riding is the quickest way to get there. We're also close to St Kilda and that's an easy ride too. I love riding and of course it's a pretty healthy and environmentally friendly way to travel.

The only thing I need to master is the wearing of regular clothing whilst cycling. I find having to change from exercise wear a bit of a pain. And besides, I've seen lots of people manage in dresses, jeans, high heeled boots and looking fabulously chic. That's my goal. To be able to ride anywhere, wearing whatever I wish.

I try to wear regular clothing where possible, but so far I have ripped two pairs of jeans in the process. Apparently, jeans need stretch to cope with the leg up, leg down motion?!

Until recently, I occasionally drove.

Until last week at least, when I sold my car.

Even though I don't really need a car for the lifestyle I lead, and in fact only drove 4000km in the past TWO YEARS, it still feels like a loss.

A car feels like independence, to me at least.

I've had a car since I was 17 and have always driven, aside from those four years in the UK. When I got back the last time it had been two years since I'd driven and I felt like I needed to re-learn how! It wasn't automatic to me anymore and became something I needed to consciously think about how to do.

However it didn't feel like a negative not to have a car when I lived overseas, in fact I remember it felt quite free. No rego, insurance, unexpectedly expensive services (last time, nearly $1000!

It's just a matter of changing my thinking.

Even though we put it on carsale.com a month or so ago, I was still quite resistant to selling it and put the price a bit too high. No enquiries - phew. Oh, except for a scammer. That doesn't count :)

And then, one night, I met a friend for a drink in a neighbouring suburb. I had two wines but decided I'd walk home rather than drive.

Nearly two weeks later, I was walking around the area. I saw a car. It looked a lot like my car. I did a double take. There was a missing hub cap. The number plate was ... the same. It WAS my car. And it was in a half an hour PERMIT zone and had somehow not gotten a ticket.

I had left it there for two weeks and had not even once needed it or thought of it or wondered where it was. I know.

Clearly, I did not need it

So we lowered the price and got enquiries straight away and soon it was sold to lovely new owners who really want it and will probably drive it a lot more than me. Plus I now have a nice little sum of cash to use for some wedding expenses, which is definitely more than worth a little sacrifice.

The car is the barometer of your direction

That's what Annette Noontil says in her book, "The Body is the Barometer of your soul" (it's a bit like Louise Hay's book, which I prefer). Some of them are obvious, like constantly driving around on empty.

Which makes me wonder what sailing along "just fine" and then realising there are actually structurally significant problems that need to be fixed means?! That can't be good! Some extra repairs at the end when we did the roadworthy test did help to soften my recent romantic delusions about how fabulous it was to have my "problem free" and rarely-driven car.

She says that not being able to find where you parked your car your signfies a lack of direction. So, Annette, what does it mean if you FIND your car, and you aren't even LOOKING for it, hey??

Oh.

Come to think of it, I think that's exactly what has happened for Nadine and I recently, with our unexpectedly popular and already sold-out unstuck workshops. Not to mention the deliciously excited talks we're now having about other options and opportunities.

Ok, Annette, you win that one.

So tell me, how do you get around? Is a car necessary to your lifestyle? If your car has ailments, what might they mean? And if you don't have a car, can you please reassure me it will be fine?! :)

Change doesn't have to be hard

2010-06-23T18:35:00.010+10:00

Doing things the hard way

Isn't it interesting how often we choose to do things the hard way. Especially when it comes to change. And even more so when it comes to changing ourselves. Do you? We don't mean to, it just happens like that. Often doing it the hard way means doing it alone and/or being really hard on yourself in the process.

That was definitely true for me, in those (ahem) 14 years of on/off depression, which I wrote about briefly here and sort of over here. Clearly I need to revisit that whole story. I was sure I'd told it. I mustn't have been ready yet.

For me, doing things the hard way meant blaming and criticising myself for how I felt, feeling annoyed at how I felt and angry at myself for not being more in control. For making mistakes. For - the horror! - not being perfect.

And wherever possible, denying, blocking and suppressing my feelings and emotions. Often with busyness, which was generally quite effective. Until I stopped, of course.

Big mistake!

I often felt worst when I thought I should be feeling better, such as during the holidays. And as a teacher, there were plenty of holidays. I had no idea what to do about this. So I just tried to be busier. Even after the depression left, this was a hard habit to break.

Another thing I did, without even realising, was cut off from my heart. I guess my heart was giving me messages of pain that I had no idea what to do with. It was like I couldn't trust myself to feel. I knew where that would finish up, with me feeling stuck and miserable.

I had to use my will and my mind to keep myself from the ever present threat of depression which I felt could sneak up on me at any time if I wasn't vigilant. And then take me days or weeks or months to get out of.

Feeling my heart was a luxury I could not afford.

I could think happiness, joy and love. But it got to the point where I really couldn't feel them.

What I could feel in my heart area was heavy, blocked, stagnant, tight, uncomfortable. Empty.

Good times.

When I first started seeing a Kinesiologist it was mostly because all the external factors of my life were pretty much as I thought I wanted them, but I still felt lost. I was still searching. I couldn't feel. I had no idea what I really wanted. I was barely managing to keep myself afloat.

There was nowhere left to go but within.

This was where it started for me and Kinesiology sessions. Lots and lots of stuff related to the heart. Loving and accepting myself (huh?), feeling connected to myself and others and just lots and lots of emotions stuck in the heart - fear, anxiety, melancholy, anger, sadness. All the things I did not want to feel.

Kinesiology brings what is hidden to our conscious awaress where it can be healed and the energetic side clears the energy around what is stuck or blocked.

I remember how strange it was to start feeling my heart. It felt lighter, there was warmth. I started to actually feel my emotions again. Good emotions - not just unpleasantness.

That was the beginning.

This is the thing with Kinesiology. It's about looking at your stuff properly - and yes, it does cut straight to the point. But it's also about being really gentle and kind with yourself during the process and not getting stuck in the hard.

Allowing flow back into your life.

I remember at the end of her first session, one client who'd had many sessions of more traditional therapies admitted she felt better but said:

"I don't get it. That wasn't hard enough. Weren't we supposed to really go into everything from my past ... re-live it ... feel all the emotion again? Really describe every detail? Shouldn't it feel more painful? It just feels like that was too easy."

Here's the thing. The hard way hadn't worked. And we joked about that. I still see this client now, a year later and she's definitely past that. There is always going to be stuff and there might be strong emotions of fear or sadness or anger.

But that doesn't mean it has to be hard.

I've noticed that for most people, it seems to come back to self acceptance. Really accepting yourself, even with whatever is going on for you. Even with the emotions you wish you didn't have. This is what works, what creates real change.

If you're used to being hard on yourself it doesn't seem possible. But there we are. Nearly always, part of the change that people need to make is to start to be more gentle with themselves.

I'm sure you won't be surprised to hear that I often attract girls with anxiety and depression - even if they don't know my background. I can tell as soon as they walk in the door. They look drawn, anxious, flat. They are smart, lovely girls and women with everything going for them. But they still feel miserable.

And I love that I have a strong suspicion that it's about to change.

I suppose this on my mind today for two reasons. One of these girls wrote this lovely review on google maps:

'Initially, I went to see if Kerry could help me with a deep, dark depression that I had been stuck in for 10 years. Even though countless other therapies had not helped at all, Kerry has made it disappear completely!
I am so amazed at the benefits of kinesiology that I've even decided to study it myself!‎'

And I saw a new client last week who like me, couldn't feel her heart at all. She joked that even in high school, people had remarked she had a 'cold, black heart'. And this week?

'I feel so much better on the inside. I think its starting to show because yesterday at work, four separate people told me that I looked "vibrant", "shiny" or "glowing". And today 2 more people said there was something different about me. It's just so wonderful to feel better and more positive about the future.

Meeting you is definitely one of the best things to happen to me.'

Imagine.

Image: Bendo silhouette by cvanstane

A lesson in looking after yourself .. and detachment

2010-06-20T20:56:00.008+10:00

I was talking to my sister the other night about the whole money vs looking after yourself thing. How often we seek help right at the moment we need it, rather than having a planned approach to looking after ourselves (like booking sessions in advance). On feeling like there needs to be a "problem to fix" for us to justify spending money on our wellbeing.

And she has a pretty interesting perspective on this stuff so I suggested she share it with you. Here it is.

So my sister, Kerry asked me to do a “guest blog” after a conversation we had. I said, "no, I’m not the writer in the family." Reconsidered.. and here I am!

I was commenting that I used to always book in appointments to make me feel good or because I felt drained and in need of an instant “quick fix” pick-me-up at the last minute.

In fact, who am I kidding? I still do it now.

Whether it’s a haircut, massage, acupuncture, kinesiology session, facial, naturopathy or getting my eyebrows waxed, I often find myself on the phone asking if there’s any appointments free that week.

I must admit, I did break out of this mould just over a year ago when I was feeling pretty shattered with work and depressed after a long period of time trying unsuccessfully to fall pregnant. I committed to seeing an acupuncturist monthly.

Same day, same time, every month.

In the beginning… I wanted to “FIX THINGS” and get pregnant, plain and simple.

I asked lots of questions “what are you doing now?” “what are you checking for there?” “has that improved do you think?”

After a while I decided to forget “TRYING TO FIX THINGS”and just go with it. And ultimately I felt better when I left. It was worth it just for that fact. It was something I enjoyed each month and it fit in with my weekly schedule.

What do you know… when I stopped thinking I could “FIX EVERYTHING” and enjoyed the experience without expectation, things started to shift. I put my faith in the fact that I knew I would feel better when I left. I started to feel more in the flow of life. Happier. Less tired.

Also?

I fell pregnant.

I’m not saying that the acupuncturist was the answer to everything. But what I do know is that when I scheduled in “me time” regularly. I felt better on a day to day basis, less likely to “hit a wall” so to speak. I still go monthly.

I feel less weary and look forward to my monthly sessions – almost like a top up in the wellbeing account!! The monthly commitment is an investment in me "feeling good".

It’s just the experience I had so I thought I’d share. xxx

Isn't that freaking awesome??

How much do you value yourself?

2010-06-17T21:44:00.006+10:00

Let the sunshine in, little umbrella
Originally uploaded by seanmcgrath

Do you love yourself enough to invest in yourself?

Oooh this can be a difficult one, for lots of us. Whilst it makes sense to spend money on ourselves in a way that has real value, many people find it challenging.

At the moment someone close to me is struggling with some stuff - major stress about money. Bearing in mind that, as is often the case, there is the "actual" issue, and then there's all the stuff they're telling themselves about the issue. Which is making it feel ten times worse. And also bearing in mind that when people close to me have issues it does push my "I need to fix and help this" buttons which yep - is something I'm working on.

It feels so real

The thing with money is that when it's a problem it feels so real and present and impossible to argue with. It's there in black and white. We can feel like there are no options.

I was talking to Amanda, my original Kinesiologist, and now friend, about the situation and how I could deal with it without getting too involved (or overwhelmed myself).

So Amanda asked me, "Are they having some Kinesiology sessions then? To move it along?"

This person has had Kinesiology (though not with me) in the past.

Oh no, I said, I think they'd definitely say they don't have money for that at the moment.

"Ha!" said Amanda:

The ones who need it the most always say that.

They save that ninety or hundred dollars and stay stuck in their fears, in feeling like they've got no choice but to feel terrible, it starts to affect their health, their happiness and their relationships.

If they'd just spend the money on a session or two, they'd get some clarity, see new choices, options and opportunities and change the situation, or at least how it's affecting them."

Pretty nuts huh?

Who would do that?

*Sheepishly raises hand*

That is definitely something I've done in the past. Thankfully it's something I've personally moved past. Phew. But then, I need to be relatively sorted and clear to do my work, so spending money on my own wellbeing is pretty much essential.

I'd argue it's kind of essential for all of us.

Money is definitely a tricky and complicated area. And many of us were raised to believe it is wasteful to spend money on ourselves and our happiness and wellbeing - unless we really need it. Like, we're sick. Or have run out of other options.

But it feels true!

Let's look at this. It is quite rare that we actually do not have the money to do something, especially something that's in the $100 range. Maybe we can't do it every week - but it's money we can come up with, even if things are tight, over a period of say, a month.

When we say we don't have enough money to look after ourselves, it is usually more likely that we either don't see the value that can be gained from getting ourselves back in balance, we don't know how (hint: Kinesiology is one good way), we don't value ourselves enough to invest in our own wellbeing, or we just want to spend the money elsewhere.

Undecided?

I'm sure most of us have had the experience of being stressed with "no money" and then either accidentally or intentionally having a big night out to "forget about everything" and "have some fun". The next day, we're tired, probably hungover ... we've spent wayyy more than we intended ... and now we feel worse. If we can find the money to do that, we can find the money to look after ourselves.

Otherwise it might be the couple of lattes we have each day, the impulse buys at lunch, whatever. If we're working, we generally have money. And aside from the essentials of shelter and bills, we are constantly making choices about how we spend that money.

Investing in yourself works

Often regular Kinesiology clients report feeling more flow and ease in daily life. In addition to those things they might focus on in their session, they'll often say they're:

- attracting in the right people to help them
- getting the support they need
- seeing more options for ther lives
- easily finding solutions
- generally liking themselves more and feeling happier
- taking action

What price can you put on that?

And sometimes, clients start to attract more money too. This is especially true if you bring it in as something to focus on. Wanting more money in your life is no bad thing - most of us are more effective when we're not in survival mode. Funny, that!

What kinds of things? One regular client won a major cash/travel prize at work as recognition for her efforts last year, another attracted the right people to sell her house at a higher price and for greater ease than she'd expected, several have moved to higher paying jobs that they enjoy far more.

I often find that the times when I'm truly nourishing and investing in myself, the phone seems to ring more often with new bookings. Everything flows. Interesting, huh.

When your internal world is balanced, the outside world reflects that.

Do you invest in yourself? If so, how?
If not, I wonder what good might flow in if you did?

Being curious about what blocks us

2010-06-11T17:20:00.007+10:00

So I'm exploring what it is like to do yoga and writing every day.

These are two things that I love to do. And I want to do them. And I know they're good for me - nourishing and helpful and kind. Not only that, I've now kind of committed myself ... mostly in my head ... to doing these things every day for the next 21 days.

And I'm wondering why the yoga, in particular, has always felt difficult. And why, even though I've been wanting to do a daily yoga practice for years, I've never managed it.

Being curious

Sometimes it can help to take an exploratory approach when looking at the things that are blocking you. So often we go straight into frustration or annoyance at ourselves about our behaviours ... WHY won't I do this or that thing.

So anyway, play along if you want. Is there something you want to do (something you know is good for you - like eating well or exercising regularly) that you somehow don't get to?

Let's begin

Speculate. Wonder. What might the reason be? Let's just play with it. Write down whatever ideas come to you.

While I'm telling myself that doing yoga every day would be helpful and nourishing and fun, what is my body actually hearing?

- routine (=boring!)
- oh my god, another thing I have to do
- tick off the list - that's over with!
- you're going to make me get up early and be tired all day
- there is something here about not deserving pleasure that I don't pay for (that is weird! And quite unhelpful!)
- there is something else about not being good enough which I also don't understand. I don't feel this in a yoga class - it doesn't cross my mind. Why is this coming up about doing it by myself (oh right, my main critic)
- oh my goodness, my body is worried I'd be creating something for me to be critical of myself about - no WONDER it doesn't want me to do it

I am kind of surprised about the self criticism thing - I thought I'd let a lot of that go ... not with everything apparently ...

What about for you? Are you surprised at any of the responses you get?

Whatever we feel exists for a reason.

Is there somewhere you'd feel ok to start?

What about if you were to try this thing? Is there a starting point that you do actually feel comfortable with? Something that you'd find easy and fun and completely unthreatening?

For me and my yoga it was savasana (lying on the floor for 20 minutes). There is nothing about savasana that has anything to do with achievement and I don't even know how you could judge if you'd done a good job. By stillness maybe?!

The first day of my yoga I just did savasana. The next day, I felt like rocking on my back a bit too. I can't help but notice that each day I'm doing my practice a bit earlier in the day, doing a few more postures (that I feel like doing - there's no plan!) and actually enjoying it more and more.

And it is actually starting to feel like I always thought it should - something that is fun and nurturing and gentle. Something that I want to do ... and actually do.

Knowledge transmuted into wisdom

This is something that has also been coming up for some of my clients lately. So often we know what is best for us. Yet there is a big difference between knowing things and actually doing them, something that Marg just wrote about. But don't be too hard on yourself ... there is probably a really good reason!

But don't forget to ask yourself what it might be.

The knowledge might just be enough to change the way you feel about it so that you can go ahead and actually do it.

Image from Flickr: Yoga Girl by tiffanywashko

Writing and yoga - 21.5.800

2010-06-08T21:40:00.004+10:00

Writing and yoga are two things I definitely love ... but don't always make enough time for. So maybe that's why I was attracted to Bindu's 21.5.800 challenge - 21 days of practising yoga five days a week and writing at least 800 words a day.

It started on Tuesday 8th ... but you could join in if you like ... here's Bindu's guidelines:

THE WRITING: The writing can be ANYTHING. Memoir, blogs, business plans, essays, fiction, free-writing, letters,……..ANYTHING. The point is to get writing again daily and to have the boundaries and challenge of a daily word count to reach.

THE YOGA: There are several options for you to do the yoga portion of 21.5.800 5 times in 7 days. Here are the options:

1. Go to a yoga class in your ‘hood.
2. Do a yoga dvd at home.
3. Take a 20-40 minute savasana* (lying on the floor)

I'm feeling a little bad because it's already getting late and I haven't done either the writing OR the yoga yet ... however I'll now head over to the lounge room floor for some nice relaxing savasana and if I don't make the 800 words that will be ok for today.

However I'm looking forward to developing a routine and seeing what insights come up over the 21 days...

The Tower - Chaos? Well, definitely change.

2010-06-04T15:13:00.005+10:00

Getting comfortable with the tower

If there is one card practically noone likes to show up in a tarot reading, it's the tower. No doubt about it, the tower means change. Often dramatic and unexpected and yep, a little out of our control.

Except ... take a look at the foundations of the tower in the image.

They're not exactly strong.

The tower is breaking apart and causing chaos because whatever it is that is falling apart was never strong enough to begin with. It can be something you've put your trust in, something you assumed to be stable such as a job or relationship, it could be that you're overly reliant on what others think of you, or that you've been choosing to ignore the dark and billowing clouds that have indicated a need for change for a while ...

What is real?

Sometimes the tower can feel like it comes out of the blue - and we get to find out, that confidence, that trust, that self belief ... is it real? Or do we need to work on that a little more?

When the tower shows up, it can mean that the things in your life that are not built on strong ground are going to be shaken up. The truth is going to come out. When the fuss and chaos has died down you will know where you're really at.

Don't be afraid, but do look at what's going on

I've learnt the tarot before but I'm doing another course at the moment ... and this week the tower has been coming up for me. And yes things did feel a little shaky within for a day or two. Rather than being fearful when the tower (or challenge in general) shows up, just think: interesting. What does that mean for me?

The tower can also signify a break through.

If you're willing to look at and deal with what's going on (and it's kind of hard not to look at the tower!) you can end up feeling like you might after a storm has passed, kind of cleansed and clear, with a greater sense of focus. And yes, a Kinesiology session will definitely help clear through some of that debris!

Getting clear

The truth will not necessarily be bad ... it might be that you just need to go within and really get clear about what you want and need and make sure you are giving that to yourself. There might be some attitudes, beliefs or behaviours from the past that you really need to let go of ... and you're being pushed to do this.

Avoidance ... just makes things worse

It's like in a Kinesiology session ... being honest with ourselves and learning from challenges and being prepared to address any negatives (so often this is related to how we speak to ourselves) can really result in amazing break throughs.

Staying on the surface and trying to ignore the things we don't want to feel or think about ... well, it only works for a while.

Whatever - the tarot is part of the cycle of life, there sometimes needs to be a breaking down of sorts to make way for the new. The card that follows the tower is the Star ... making a wish, setting goals, reaching for the stars. Sometimes we need to let go of some stuff first.

Oooh, free tarot readings

Here are two lovely sites for free tarot readings: Free Lotus Tarot and the Gaian Oracle.

So do tell, what's in the cards for you?

(And despite what I just said - I do kind of hope it's not the tower!!)

Feeling your feelings

2010-05-31T16:55:00.004+10:00

Nicole's many feelings by allyaubry

I love this post on Feelings from @hiroboga (you can find her on Twitter). It's all about ... you guessed it, feelings - the language of the body.

People often laugh or cry in a Kinesiology session ... these are just two ways we release the energy associated with feelings. Both are equally good as an emotional release but it's fair to say that many of us favour laughing over crying. Rest assured ... crying is definitely a good thing. So much better than holding onto our emotions! As Hiro says,

All feelings are energy. Energy is vibration—in its natural state, it moves freely. When feelings are stifled or suppressed, or when you cling to them or make up stories in your head about them, you run into problems. (Emotions are feelings with a thought or thoughts attached.)

It's not the feeling itself that causes the problem.

Of course, we often know this. But the reality of our response doesn't always reflect it. If we feel joy it is natural to laugh ... however emotions such as anger or sadness are not so easily or socially appropriately expressed.

We tend to squash them down, suppress them, ignore them. If we do admit to them we tend to view them as bad, it can be almost like we see it as a failing that we have ALLOWED this negative emotion to come about.

Our feelings and emotions can also get mixed up with those of other people. And often our experience of emotions is heightened through links to experiences from our past, through the amygdala part of the brain which drags up similar emotional memories to helpfully aid our survival.

Kinesiology can be particularly helpful in this case, allowing you to discover the original stressful situations that may have locked into your body ... and to help diffuse the stress around them so you're not bound to whatever options or choices you had at that time.

Surrogating emotions (taking on) the emotions of eg your parents is particularly common in children. Sometimes we carry emotions for years without the conscious awareness that they're not even ours.

Feelings and emotions obviously exist to give us important information that enables us to survive ... to learn and to grow ... to experience life.

If you ignore the emotions you don't want to feel for long enough you can start to become confused about HOW you feel ... this is often the case with depression. Unpleasant feelings unexpressed or unacknowledged tend to end up in a big uncomfortable mess of yuck that feels hard to deal with.

Suppressing our emotions often leads us to feeling stuck.

Hiro encourages us to be playful with our feelings, to be curious about them. It reminded me of the way feelings and emotions are approached in a Kinesiology session ... as interesting and rational pieces of information that we try to unravel and feel compassion for ... rather that ignore.

Identify a feeling you’re feeling right now ... Notice where this feeling is located, in your body. What is its texture? Its flavor or color, its density, its shape? Does it feel prickly or cold? Small, hard, lukewarm? Like a jelly bean? Is it sour or dry, juicy or squishy?

How easy is it for you to feel your emotions in your body? Sometimes in a Kinesiology session I will encourage clients to focus on where they feel eg anxiety in their body ... this can be hard to start with but you do become more aware over time.

I love this part of the process here, which involves feeling the emotion of anger - an emotion that most of us have particular problems expresssing.

Once anger is flowing freely, notice how it feels, and how you feel. Then—in the spirit of exploration and experimentation—stop the flow of anger in your body. Shut it down, suppress it, argue with it or rationalize it—your choice. Notice how you feel when the flow of anger-energy is interrupted or stopped.

What an opportunity ... to consciously feel an emotion flowing freely ... and then to deliberately stop it and to really observe what this does to your body.

Soooo ... come play. You can read about the whole process here ... I'd love to hear how you go if you try it!

Transition essence comp!

2010-05-23T13:59:00.007+10:00

Change ...

Sometimes, when we're feeling stuck, real change seems impossible to achieve.

This month I'm giving away a Bush Flower "Transition Essence".

Flower essences are vibrational remedies that can have subtle yet powerful effects on your energy. Transition essence is a blend designed to assist you during times of change.

To win, just leave a comment by the end of Monday 31st May sharing ...

a quote about change
a comment about a transition time you're going through
how you feel about change
something like that ...

Willingness to change often comes up in Kinesiology sessions, especially at the start. Often we think we're ready for change ... but what we really want is for things around us to change ... we want a new job, or our health to improve, the anxiety to be gone, to have better relationships ... or whatever it is.

We just want things to be different, with minimal effort on our behalf.

Unfortunately, imbalances in our lives often reflect imbalances within. Changing the external and forgetting the internal will often just 'solve the problem' temporarily. We get the new job and a few months later realise we're not sure about that either ... attract new relationships with similar issues ... mask the anxiety with a pill or drinking ...

We have to start with ourselves. And we have to be willing to put in some work. Something like Kinesiology or yoga helps you to make changes from within ... and over time you learn to see your own patterns and create balance within yourself.

* Subscribe to follow up comments to read what other people write and to find out who the winner is! I'll then get the winner to email me and post the essence out to them! :)

There's also the Yoga and Kinesiology Getting Yourself Unstuck workshop on July 10th!

Get unstuck!

2010-05-20T20:29:00.004+10:00

We all get stuck. Things become cloudy. Nothing flows. We WANT change. But it feels completely out of reach. Decisions, choices... it all feels too hard.

Come join Nadine and I for the Unstuck workshop!

Workshop includes a strong yoga practice and elements of Kinesiology, including acupressure and visualisation.

Learn how to tune in to your ‘stuck’. Use yoga and acupressure to create balance in your body. Get things flowing again. Feel calmer, clear and more at peace. So you can shine!

The Hub, 17 Waterview Walk, Docklands
Saturday 10 July 2010, 2 - 5.30pm, $75
Book here.

Epiphanies are Stoopid

2010-05-09T13:19:00.010+10:00

raindrops, leaf by Вася Артёмов

The trouble with epiphanies is that when you GET it? Seems so obvious. It's almost crazy that that you didn't get it earlier.

Yep, epiphanies are kind of stoopid.

And pretty common in Kinesiology.

You won't always get them, but there is something about the way that the information comes together that can allow you to see what you're doing - your patterns - in a whole new light. And all of a sudden you can have a whole new realisation. Amazing.

And you might find that when you try and put that ASTONISHING new insight into words, or try and explain it to someone else, it just seems kind of obvious. Like - yeah, of course. So hard to convey the life changing awesomeness of this new thing you get. And not just 'get it in your head' but really, truly understand it in your body and what it means for you in your life moving forwards.

Let's try some examples from clients.

"So I'm always seeking recognition and acceptance from others. And yet when I do get praise or acknowledgement I refuse to accept it. That's NEVER GOING TO WORK!"

"I'm really sensitive and I pick up on everybody else's feelings and emotions and then I get overwhelmed and confused and think that my own life is falling to pieces when really I just need to get some clearer BOUNDARIES!"

"I put others first and try to protect other people from how I feel but now I'm the one who feels sick or upset or angry. I'm protecting them but hurting ME!"

"I feel isolated and alone and depressed at this time of year because subconsciously it reminds me of that time in high school when all my friends turned against me because it was 'my turn' to be bullied ... right before the school holidays. But that's so not true NOW!"

Sometimes just the recognition of what's going on and the understanding of how it's impacting on you now is enough to let it go. And the Kinesiology helps to move the energy of it.

Boring old me and my pet kangaroo*

So I stole the title of this post from one of Havi's. Oh and that heading too. I read her blogs - Fluent Self and Shivanata - just about every day and her ideas have been so influential in the way I think about pretty much everything, especially in relation to my business.

One of the biggest things I'm really, properly learning is that it is ok to be completely yourself*. Oh look! Another epiphany that is completely obvious when written down. I mean, that's pretty much my whole work.

But it's about really owning that, being ok to do that in a visible way and getting clear on what is important to you. In every area of life. Even as things grow and change. Especially as things grow and change.

So I guess I have a mentor! On the other side of the world, who I've never met and who has no reason to know that I exist. Sometimes she even teaches me stuff in my dreams which I will definitely admit is kind of weird. I guess it is just my subconscious processing what I've read.

Ah, the power of the internets.

So anyway, what about you? Any epiphanies you'd like to share?

Living Creatively

2010-05-08T13:30:00.009+10:00

Crayola Lincoln Logs by laffy4k

I was talking about work with another of the girls at Sakura Lounge recently. She asked,

"Do you get stressed by your work?"

Truthfully I don't get stressed by seeing clients. As you can probably guess, I love what I do.

Sometimes the first session in particular can be very emotional for the client and at the start the list of things that Aren't Going Well is often rather long.

However I've had so many experiences of seeing those same clients come back a week or two later looking different; lighter, and feeling much better already. And I've repeatedly seen how quickly things start to move forwards from there ... so I know that things will change. It's awesome. And I balance Kinesiology with the other work I do, including some work in an office environment.

"I can't imagine you in an office job!" the girl told me,

"I can only see you as Kerry the Kinesiologist!"

Isn't it funny how things change.

It reminded me of how just a few years ago, I felt so stuck in teaching. I knew I didn't want to be a teacher for my whole life. But I had no idea what I wanted to do. No idea where to begin.

Nothing was jumping out whatsoever. And I was also really busy. That's what I remember about teaching. The constant rush of too much to do, not enough time to do it properly and how will I avoid getting burnt out. Pressured and so structured.

Though I'd been seeing a Kinesiologist, I didn't even consider it as an option for me til after I'd had a pretty extroadinary session - the one where we worked on the depression stuff that had been around for years.

It was in a Kinesiology session soon after that it came up that I was 'bored'.

"I am NOT bored, I am WAY too busy," I said.

However, when we looked into it, yep I was bored. And when we went looking for what it was that I did want? I recall it was hard to get to. And then the word creativity came up. Which made me cry! I had no idea why. But creative I was definitely not.

Creativity comes in many forms.

Creativity is obviously not just drawing or writing or creating some other form of art ... you can be creative in the way you live your life and express yourself.

I've noticed the (very) occasional person in my life wondering where I'm taking all of this ... do I have a goal to work full time as a Kinesiologist, do I have a preference for one aspect of what I do. I can see the variety is confusing for them. Perhaps to them it would feel unstable. It's not the standard way to approach your work life.

But truly - the balance is what works for me. And I find it creative. I may not continue to work in an office forever but the doing a million things? It suits me. As much as I love Kinesiology, I also love it because it's not all I do.

It is so amazing to have the choice.

Some of my clients are at that stage of wanting to make the move into something new ... yet not knowing what that is. I've missed out a few steps here. It wasn't easy. There were plenty of steps along the way and often I couldn't see where I was going.

If I had? I probably would have gotten in the way, creating walls and limitations through my own fears that it wasn't possible.

Looking after myself

I'm not complacent, I consciously continue to look after myself. I restrict the number of clients I see in a day and schedule breaks. I make sure I do things for myself like have massages and Kinesiology sessions and go to yoga and do meditation. I do quite a bit of self Kinesiology too - holding points, working with chakras, using flower essences and cards.

We'll be looking at some of that stuff at the (fully booked) Getting Yourself Un-Stuck workshop next Sunday (though there's another next month!)

Balance - at last!

So yes, I've been through some very unbalanced times to get here but now my life is working pretty well. I work casually in an office job related to my background in education and am incredibly fortunate to be able to do as little or as much as I am able to with that. And I also do some online work related to education and web 2.0ish stuff from home. Plus of course I write my blog and now I'm doing workshops and so it goes.

I like variety and am comfortable with different roles and I have a balance of working with others (I do like having colleagues), in groups, by myself and one-on-one, working deeply with emotions and just focusing on a task, complete freedom and some structure.

So there we go. I didn't have a clear picture of what I wanted, but I was committed to change and working on myself and trusting my instincts.

If you're also looking for big change in your life I would say this:

Dream big. And trust yourself. It is possible.

On grieving

2010-05-03T21:58:00.009+10:00

Velvet by »dolfi«

I can't say that I knew much at all about grief until this year, and compared to many, I still don't.

The first

You might remember that I wrote about the experience that Laurence and I had the weekend we got engaged. That was really my first close up experience of death. It was traumatic and graphic, though not personal, as of course we didn't know the man.

Earlier this year, I had my second experience. My 21 year old cousin, full of life and fun, was in London for the first time, a place that I lived for several years. Within 24 hours he was dead, unwittingly elecrocuted crossing train tracks. Such a vibrant, fun person ... someone I remembered most as a child; blonde hair, rough and tough through growing up on a cattle station and so good natured. The type of child that falls over and rather than crying, immediately laughs. Attending that funeral was among the worst experiences of my life. Such obvious unfairness.

On energy

When you work with energy like I do, it is interesting to observe how what happens in your life impacts on your work. After the funeral, I didn't have any new enquiries for about three weeks ... my energy kind of shut down for a bit - I had enough to work with existing clients, but apparently noone new.

Around this time I had a Kinesiology session. The Kinesiologist I saw is intuitive and commented that there may be a third.

And there was.

The third death was my Grandfather. I mentioned him over here. He really had such an enormous impact on my life and my childhood in particular. He was a true adventurer, and a visit to my Grandparents farm inevitably involved go-carts, teepees, canoes, boats, fishing, yabbying, water fights or some form of action. He didn't necessarily deal so well with the ageing thing and the not being able to be the adventurer anymore. His death was not completely unexpected, and in many ways, as he now lived in hospital, it was a blessing that the situation had not persisted for years longer.

This was my intellectual reaction.

My body did not experience it that way.

Philosphical initially, I found that the death impacted on me in ways I hadn't anticipated. Old anxieties, sadness, worries, fears, insecurities, memories, even a little bit of depression, came back up to the surface again. Things I thought I'd dealt with were suddenly back. I felt terrible.

What is going on?

Extreme and unconsciously controlled emotions, like grief, come from the amygdala part of the brain, where emotional associations related to particular events are stored. These are the emotions that can seem to come from nowhere, the ones we don't expect and can't always explain. These are the emotions we're going back to when we find signficant times and events from your past.

'Once emotional memory is lodged in our subconscious amygdala, a stimulus can trigger these emotions and feelings to enter our consciousness, often with the same power and impact of the original event'

Dr Charles Krebs, A Revolutionary Way of Thinking

In my case, feeling the grief, sadness, insecurity and worry I felt with the death of my Grandfather, along with the knowledge that he'd battled depression for the past twenty years, brought back up to the surface countless other times I'd experienced those emotions over the years. I guess the depth of the emotion brought more examples to the surface that usual.

It was like my Grandfather was one of the cornerstones of my life - one I didn't even realise was quite so foundational. Losing him made me all of a sudden feel unsafe, unstable, insecure. And of course, there was also the little girl in me who still knew that she was loved and adored by her Grandfather, and that he could not be replaced by anyone.

Has that ever happened to you?

I've realised this is what happens for many of my clients too, and in many cases it is probably what has brought them to Kinesiology - grief of some kind - whether relationship loss, death, trauma, job change, a major fear, whatever it may be, has suddenly brought all their stuff to the surface. What was previously bearable now needs to be looked at.

Sometimes people say - I can't understand why this is all happening now.

Though I'm not going to suggest it's a good thing or that you'll see it that way, it can be an opportunity to work through some deeper issues and improve the way you view your life and yourself.

Life keeps happening of course, you're never 'sorted'. But once you've actually worked on your stuff, when and if it comes back up to the surface, it usually moves through more quickly and smoothly.

And that's what I found. I allowed myself to feel how I felt, accepted it, reminded myself that I would feel better soon, did some self Kinesiology, had a few Kinesiology sessions ... and things soon felt more stable again. However that was me, dealing with this particular situation, in the best way that I could. There are far more extreme forms of grief and it goes without saying that different situations require a different approach depending on the individual.

Extreme emotions

Feeling extreme emotions is part of life. You don't have to cut off or deny them. Sometimes we make it worse for ourselves, especially if the reason for our emotion is less obvious, or in our eyes 'acceptable', by thinking that we shouldn't feel this way, we shouldn't be in this position. Many of my clients are harsh on themselves in this way.

What you feel is what you feel.

But you don't have to get stuck and continue to go downhill either.

Hope & Joy . . .

2010-04-20T11:10:00.006+10:00

It is often such a big decision to make an appointment to see someone like a Kinesiologist and it was for me too ... will it be the right thing? Should I just go for a massage instead? Or do I really need a counsellor? Will I like her? Will it work? What do they even DO?!!

That was exactly the experience this client had. She just wrote a part of her story and has given me permission to share it with you ...

My mum started seeing a kinesiologist / chiropractor after being very ill and being recommended by a friend of hers. I left home before she started seeing her guy and I remember talking to her about it briefly over the phone and she has always referred to him as her “witch doctor” but she never really went into what he did with her.

I’ve always been interested in self-development and have been helped at times by the right people and information being brought into my life at the right times and I’ve always been open to alternate therapies.

Cut forward to late 2009.

I’m well and truly stuck in a pretty deep dark rut, I’d say I was bordering on a meltdown. I was pushing my partner away, I was very rarely happy or motivated, I had been consistently fighting regular throat gland infections for as long as I could remember (on and off for at least 3 years).

I’d had some really low moments with my partner and had been considering the idea of seeing a counsellor about the issues swamping me. I’d also always had trouble verbalising my feelings and thoughts, scared that the true me would push the people I loved away. Around this same time my throat glands had swollen again.

Enter Google and then Kerry.

Before I had the chance to chicken out I’d emailed her for an appointment. So I go to my appointment with Kerry very nervous and not sure exactly what to expect and boy did I get a pleasant surprise. I sat with Kerry while she probed me about my reasons for coming and I think the most I was able to tell her were the issues around my throat glands/infections. So we started there.

As it turns out Kerry and kinesiology was the very right thing for me.

After my first session with Kerry my throat pain had almost dissolved. I left the lounge really just “freaking” out (in a good way!). It took me about a block to stop shaking enough to dial my mum. I spent the next 10 minutes trying to tell my mum exactly what had happened and what Kerry and I had addressed and exactly how I felt after walking out of the lounge.

What Kerry has done for me since ...

- After the first session and since I haven’t experienced any throat gland infections (my biggest revelation!).
- I’ve worked with Kerry on verbalising my thoughts and feelings.
- Together we’ve explored some of my more deep rooted fears.
- I’m happier overall, I’m communicating well with my partner and am no longer scared to express the real me.

Kerry has scared me a few times with our work together! She quoted me Louise Hay at our second session (I think) and I remember saying to her can I have a look at that book. Sure enough I’d ordered the same book a few weeks earlier and it had been delivered to me the day before our session!

We covered a lot of Louise in subsequent sessions and I’d said to Kerry that I hadn’t yet had a chance to read the book. Kerry said to me well your body is determined to hear this information even if I have to read the whole thing to you. Since finishing the book we haven’t used Louise in our sessions!

I leave every session with Kerry feeling better, lighter, happier, more focused and prepared to tackle what’s coming.

I can’t recommend her enough. The change she has helped me to make in myself is huge. And what my mum told me is spot on.

“I can’t describe how or why but it just works!”

New! Awaken Experiences

2010-04-13T20:48:00.004+10:00

butterfly on a sunny summer day, originally uploaded by jesse.millan.

Focused 30 minute sessions that are easy to fit into your day and cost just $50. Leaving you feeling calm and clear, these sessions are a great way to look after yourself.

How to choose?

Either decide what you most want – positivity, energy or calmness … or choose your favourite tool – essences, crystals or energy work. Want to try them all? A pack of three is $135. Let me know if you’d like a gift voucher too. Fun!

The experiences ...

Positivity - Flower essences
Essences are subtle but powerful vibrational remedies which can help to dissolve negative attitudes, enabling you to create more positivity in your life. Bush, Bach and Desert flowers help to create greater awareness. They may be taken orally or combined with affirmations, acupressure points, sound or the chakras to gently create harmony in your body, leaving you feeling calm, supported and clear.

Energising - Crystals
Focusing on the wisdom of the crystals. Crystal stones, essences, cards and accompanying information are used to create insight and understanding. Combined with chakra work, acupressure points and visualisations, this session will reduce stress and help you feel lighter and refreshed.

Calming - Energy work
This calming, quiet and gentle session will really allow you to relax. When you’re stressed and stuck in your head, sometimes more information is not what you need. Get back in touch with your body. Energetic techniques which may include lightly holding a series of acupressure points, especially those associated with brain function, and the use of sound, light or flower essences in the chakras and auric fields. At the end you can find out any key themes!

What are these sessions for?

For those times that you’d love a session but you don’t have time to come in for an hour, also great for a top up between session times, to give you a boost, as a treat … or these sessions also make a lovely gift.

They're also ideal if you just want to check Kinesiology out and want to get a bit of an idea of how it works before you commit to a longer session.

These sessions wouldn't replace the full holistic experience of a regular one hour session, especially when you're trying to create change, but if you want to relax and recharge and lack time? Perfect!

At Sakura Lounge in the Melbourne CBD and Clyde St Studios, St Kilda.
Email kerry.awaken@gmail.com to make a booking or call 0403257431.
Yay!

Competition! Louise Hay CD giveaway

2010-04-05T12:21:00.015+10:00

To enter just write in the comments:

'A saying, affirmation or piece of advice you remind yourself of when you're going through a stressful time'

Hopefully we can all learn from your fabulous advice. You can get a bonus entry by just adding a comment sharing your own thoughts to any other post.

Entries close next Wednesday 14th April 2010!

I first read 'You can heal your life' by Louise Hay when I was 21. I had just finished uni (teaching) and had come across from SA to the Falls Festival in Lorne for New Years. I picked it up on impulse to read on the train on the way home. It was a major time of transition in my life and the book had a big impact.

Many of my clients also love Louise and often have a copy of her book hidden away somewhere, sometimes it has been read, sometimes not.

One time I picked the book off the shelf and showed it to a client saying, 'this is a book by Louise Hay, have you seen it before?' She nearly fell off the table.

'I just had that book delivered to my house yesterday!!'

Anyway, I was in a bookstore last week and saw this 'You can heal your life' cd study course.

'I'm going to buy that and give it away on my blog!' I immediately decided. So here we are ...

Please make sure you leave your first name and click to receive follow up comments via email. I'll draw the winner randomly (I might video it and post it here!) and write a comment with the winning entry and name asking them to email me their address ... then I'll post it out to you.

Yay! Competitions!

Brother Buba Budan

2010-04-01T09:13:00.004+11:00

I just love fabulous coffee. I try to limit myself to one a day ... or sometimes two. And like many Melburnians, I am happy to walk past ten or twenty ordinary coffee shops on route to my favourites.

Last year, when I was making plans to leave my regular job to build my Kinesiology business, I was telling Laurence of the ways I might cut back my spending as my business was growing (for my own benefit rather than his interest or concern about this topic).

And I could make coffee at home, I told him.

'Kerry,' he said, 'Don't be ridiculous. There's no need to take it that far.'

Brother Buba Budan is definitely a fave. If I didn't work at Sakura Lounge I probably never would have found it, there's no sign out the front and you could easily walk past it on Little Bourke st. However it's hard to miss the queues and constant crowd of people. I managed to capture it in a quiet moment in the pic above.

And there are chairs! Hanging from the ceiling!

Twice in one week I met friends at Buba Budan, and both spontaneously photographed their coffee. So you see, this is no ordinary coffee...

I'm going to share some more of my favourites in the coming weeks ... where are you favourites?

Doing the work

2010-03-27T13:56:00.006+11:00

Talking about Kinesiology

I was talking to my Aunt this week and she asked about Kinesiology and the results people get. The process can be difficult to explain ... but often the results are quite amazing ... especially if you are 'willing to do the work'.

What does 'doing the work' mean?

This is what my Aunt asked. Mostly this is just being committed to yourself and willing to look at your stuff. Often when we want change, we want things around us to change. Usually what needs to change is us.

Changing ourselves (really?)

It turns out that changing ourselves (our attitudes, thoughts, the words we use, the way we respond to situations) is the one thing we actually have the power to do. Sigh.

Ironically, when we change ourselves - for example, from feeling like a victim to taking control of what we can do in a situation, from criticising ourselves to being gentle, from judging or ignoring our feelings to accepting ourselves - things around us seem to change too.

Getting to grips with commitment (to you!)

When you want to create change, it can mean finding one or more things that work for you and being prepared (within reason) to spend the time, money and energy to pursue them. Commitment! To you! Learning about yourself, your emotions, how they're impacting on you, subconscious attitudes that sabotage you, old fears ... and dissolving them.

This is the thing.

Lots of my clients are very smart. They often know a fair bit about what's going on for them. They think about things. Often they think about things around and around in circles to the extent that it exhausts them! And it doesn't get past that.

Kinesiology uses energetic techniques (the flower essences, tuning forks - sound, acupressure points, crystals, chakra work etc) to release the stress from your body. Phew! No wonder so many people say they feel lighter after a session.

Dad, I dug a hole!

It reminds me of the story of holes I wrote about last year. Focused effort will get a lot more results than scattered - 'I think I'll just try everything once' - efforts. Trying new things is great, however if you find that you're trying many different things and are still not feeling content or creating the changes you want ... it might be time to narrow your focus and really be prepared to go within.

As you probably already know, noone else can ever do it for you and jumping around from one thing to another can be just another form of resistance.

That's great. But I want things to change NOW ...

Well yes, that would be lovely. Louise Hay (my clients will already know that I love Louise!) talks about impatience as just another form of resistance.

'It is resistance to learning and to changing. When we demand that it be done right now, completed at once, then we don't give ourselves time to learn the lesson involved with the problem that we have created.

If you want to move to another room, you have to get up and move step by step in that direction. Just sitting in your chair and demanding that you be in the other room will not work.

It's the same thing.

We all want our problem to be over with, but we don't want to do the small things that will add up to the solution.'

Ok but how long does it taaaake?

It depends. Are you ready? Have you already done some work? Are you sort of happy to look at your stuff? In this case, sometimes dramatic results can be quickly achieved.

However if you're taking your first steps to address issues that have been with you for years and years ... there's probably no way around the fact that it could take time to look at some of that. It might be two steps forward, one step back. But it does get easier (plus more fun!)

And if my thing is Kinesiology?

With Kinesiology, 'doing the work' might involve weekly or fortnightly sessions for several months (possibly longer for issues that are acute or longstanding or if you're wanting to make some significant changes) but once things start to move forwards and feel more comfortable, many clients come monthly, give or take a week or so. If you have stuff to work through but you really just want it done, or want to skip straight to irregular appointments when crisis strikes, you might find your progress is a bit more sporadic.

Some clients who've been with me for six months or a year are now choose to come every six weeks for a top up ... they know that continuing to learn about yourself and clear stress that may be 'stuck' in the body is an investment ... you feel better able to handle the challenges life can throw at you ... and they continue to get great results over time. This is what I do too.

There can be a high cost in staying stuck (and when you know this, getting stuck again is kind of pointless).

And those issues that we refuse to deal with? They seem to keep popping up in different forms; we repeat old patterns and feel old emotions and don't seem to get much closer to understanding why, or moving forwards. And then when major life stresses occur, things can start to fall apart. We end up having to deal with our stuff. Or maybe it just spills out all over anyway.

You can only push things down for so long, it seems.

Why not make the choice to work on your stuff, rather than waiting until you feel like you have to?

Clyde St Studios

2010-03-26T16:32:00.014+11:00

Check out the delightful Studio 8 at Clyde St Studios (92 Clyde St, St Kilda, 3182).

It's such a lovely large room with a beautiful energy and natural light. I'm there Fridays - treat yourself to celebrate the end of the week and prepare for a relaxing weekend! Contact details are over here.

Nice things!

There are a couple of lovely reviews of Awaken Kinesiology on Google Local. Cute and honest too:

'I dont know how she does it - and the process is quite unusual - BUT IT WORKS!'

Go check them out! I am sooo lucky and grateful to have such wonderful regular clients. If you haven't already, you can become a fan of Awaken Kinesiology on Facebook!

Do you have health cover? Check out a list of funds that currently cover Kinesiology over at my Natural Therapy Page.

New beginnings ...

2010-03-05T16:16:00.003+11:00

Exciting times at Awaken Kinesiology ...

As well as continuing to see wonderful Kinesiology clients at Sakura Lounge, 8-10 Warburton Lane, Melbourne, 10 - 7pm Tuesdays and Thursdays ...

I'm spreading my wings ... and now seeing clients every Friday 10 - 6pm at the beautiful Clyde st Studios in St Kilda. I'll sort out some photos in the coming weeks so you can see how lovely it is ... a nice big room with lots of natural light and some art work on the walls.

The address is Studio 8, 92 Clyde st ... and there is a gorgeous cafe downstairs where you can linger for a coffee either before or after your session ... bliss!

It's exciting seeing everything fall into place ... just like in my dream, there have been a number of steps and I haven't always known where it was all heading. At times that has felt scary, but I just needed to trust that it would work out perfectly ... and it has.

What else ...

Well there is the new Awaken Kinesiology fan page ...

Awaken Kinesiology on Facebook. Please become a fan - show your support and get the latest updates! You can find a link on the side of the blog too.

I've also updated my Natural Therapy Page - check it out!

What can I work on in my Kinesiology session?

2010-01-31T16:29:00.003+11:00

Question Mark and Arrow, originally uploaded by laurakgibbs.

Why Kinesiology?

Often you'll initially decide to see a Kinesiologist for a specific reason. You've tried other avenues for whatever issue/s you may have and you're ready for something new. Many people come to see me because a friend has suggested they give Kinesiology a try.

In my case, I'd been back in Australia from the UK for nearly a year and though everything was pretty much fine, I just couldn't settle. I looked into life coaching, decided to start yoga, and then, after picking up a flyer, made an appointment to try Kinesiology.

I can't remember much about that first session but it must have been pretty good - I've been hooked ever since!

So what can I work on?

I didn't have much idea about the range of things I could use Kinesiology for at that time. When I had another bought of depression a few months later (a cycle of feeling better-ish and then worse that went on for about - oh? 14 years?) and ended up discussing it with a doctor, who recommended anti-depressants, it didn't even occur to me to work on it with my Kinesiologist. What could she possibly do?

As luck would have it, I had an appointment already scheduled the next day and it really worked. I wrote about that here.

As it turns out, many clients who come to me are experiencing varying degrees of depression/ melancholy/ anxiety/ panic/ general flatness about things, and many do find there is soon a real shift. What next? It can be a real relief to all of a sudden think about what you'd like to work on or move forwards with, rather than simply feeling stuck where you are, and wanting to be rid of (insert issue)!

There are so many things that respond well to Kinesiology. Once you've dealt with whatever the surface issues are, it can be really useful to look at what's underneath.

Other things I've worked on successfully using Kinesiology:
* Back pain
* Teeth grinding
* Goal setting and removing subconscious sabotages
* Money stress
* Balancing hormones
* Detox support

A random selection of things my clients have had success with include:
* Hair loss
* Painful periods
* De-stressing events or situations
* Recurring throat pain
* Stomach pain that tests don't explain
* Unexplained weight gain
* Grief
* Knee, hip or other joint pain

If you're not sure, it can be helpful to create a list of things that are bothering you before your Kinesiology session. Then I can test to find out what is the priority to work on.

And as most of my Kinesiology clients know, you can otherwise just say ... 'Let's see what comes up...!'

Have you had a favourite session or 'ah-ha!' moment you can share? Any questions or tips to add?

My two words for 2010

2010-01-26T15:01:00.007+11:00

I rather like the idea of choosing a couple of guiding words for my year and was rather inspired by Nadine's post about this, as well as Green Ink's, who I discovered because she wrote a lovely comment on my Duality post. So now for my words ...

Trust always seems to come up as an issue for me, particularly as I've started to take a less convential road with my career ...

I'm sure I'm not alone in liking to have some idea about what is going to happen in my life and so it has been unfamiliar territory to leave the security of a regular day job and take the risk to leap out on my own without a definite and secure plan in place. If I'd waited for that I never would have done anything! Why, I was even freaking out about this in my dreams towards the end of last year.

In this particular journey I do not have a road map and it seems the steps are being revealed to me gradually. It is testing my ability to trust ... and yet everything is unfolding perfectly, albeit not always as I'd expected.

The latest piece of the puzzle is that I am now able to work at Sakura Lounge every Tuesday and Thursday - more availability. Yay! No wonder my efforts to find another room were not coming to anything ... the universe knew that I could increase my hours right where I am if I just waited a little longer.

How am I to help my clients to achieve their dreams if I'm not prepared to take risks myself?

Some clients are curious as to why I would continue to see a Kinesiologist myself after a number of years. Basically - it gets amazing results. The type of results? They might change over time. Often people might start to see a Kinesiologist for particular issues. Once these are resolved there will inevitably be more layers to work through ... and then when things are going well ... Kinesiology is an amazing tool for working on goals and clearing any obstacles in your way.

And so what I want for this year is to continue to trust. To know that things are working out for the best, even if I don't understand it at the time.

Ahh ... joy!

The past few years have been a bit of a slog. Two years of full time work and study every second weekend ... and then in the third year, dropping a day of work and starting my business ... whilst still studying every second weekend to complete my diploma. Not to mention assignments, practice, study for never-ending exams. Lots of busyness, stress and reminders I needed to slow down. Phew. Am I glad that is over.

But this year ... it's all about the joy. Enjoying planning a wedding with my beautiful fiance, fun times with friends, trips away, lovely yoga, food and fitness ... and a sensible workload. Balance! There is always duality, but this year, I'm focusing on the joy where I can ...

What would your two words for 2010 be?

Facing fears head on

2010-01-15T15:45:00.002+11:00

I just received this story from one of my clients. Totally love it. Published with her permission here. Totally speaks for itself.

Ugh! The Company Christmas Party!!!

After our business units Christmas Party saw me throwing a tantrum (hopefully not obvious to everyone), leaving early and crying myself to sleep, I was fearing a repeat performance only this time in front of a larger crowd. I was seriously considering pulling a sickie (not a good career move in my management position).

I am new to Kinesiology. After only a couple of visits to Kerry things were looking good but the process was a mystery to me. When Kerry asked if I’d like to work on the upcoming Christmas Party I leapt at the idea – I’d try anything – but could not understand how this process could have any impact on a specific event.

Kerry asked what would be the worst thing that could happen at the party. That was easy – a repeat of the last one. “What else” says Kerry. OK, so now I had to think a little more but rattled off another half dozen embarrassing, career limiting and depressing things that could happen. “What else” says Kerry again. I had plenty, so I continued. But when Kerry asked “What else” again, I had to say that was enough! What was this about? I’d been worrying about the party for weeks and now I had a whole heap of other scenarios that I hadn’t even thought about before now to worry about. Was going with blind faith in Kerry at this point...

I left Kerry feeling better - as always – but still not overly confident about the party. Still, a party is a good excuse to pamper and nothing lost there if I didn’t go. So it was off to the day spa and then the hairdressers.

Ok, ok, I’ll go! Repeating affirmations all day, I arrived at the venue, repeated them once more, took a deep breath, put on a smile and entered the crowd.

Always a good start when heads turn and compliments abound – let’s not tell them how long I spent pampering please... Turns out I had one of the best nights I’ve had in a long time! I would have been delighted to have just got through it without a drama. But I really had fun! Not one of the things I’d talked to Kerry about happened. Feeling I wouldn’t be able to connect to anyone at the function turned out to be quite the opposite! As was evident when the “official” photos were released – there I was, there I was again, and again... I’d found my confidence! I was back! Witty, funny, communicative with all types. I bounced around, quite the little socialite and then found that people were coming to find me to talk to!

In such a good mood, I continued on to the “after party” with a select crowd. I’d had two guys from work showing more attention than usual (if not at the Christmas party, then when...) Arriving at the after party venue, one of these guys had clearly arranged for security on the door to ask for my id. (I’m 41 years old – this works) and then had a waiter waiting with big fruity cocktail something. No – nothing happened; no office scandal here, but I was feeling like a princess! It was 4am before I headed for home – did I mention I was 41 years old...

I woke the next morning, rolled over, realising I should have done that slower for the benefit of my head and then remembering the night before, I giggled out loud!

I sent a text message to the friend that had recommended Kinesiology to me - “Kinesiology Rocks!”

I’m writing this story on Kerry’s recommendation. I was miserable last time I saw Kerry – the party was over and I had a new drama to deal with. It had all been going so well and then... What was wrong with me? I felt like I was going backwards. Apparently I’m just like Shrek, I’m like an onion with layers (as Kerry explain without the Shrek reference). I realise now that I’m just “moving” and throw at me what you will, but that is way better than staying stuck in a miserable world! I had a great night; I will have more, and then even more.

Thank you Kerry for helping me. Thank you universe for listening to me. All is well in my world.

Duality. Synchronicity. And Spotlights.

2010-01-05T16:38:00.005+11:00

Microcosmos, originally uploaded by askthepixel.

The beginning

I mentioned ages ago that my boyfriend and I originally met on a tram. This is not technically true. We saw each other on the tram. We both happened to get off at Federation Square. As we both walked along Swanston St he casually turned to me and said, 'How are you going?'

It was in such a casual way I assumed I must know him already. I turned and realised I didn't. 'Oh! I'm fine, how are you?'

We chatted about how busy it was in the city due to the Commonwealth Games and when we got to the corner of Little Collins st (a few blocks away) I said, 'Ok well I'm going down here so see you later,' and turned away.

'Hey,' he said. I turned back. 'Do you want to go for a drink sometime?'

'Oh? Ok.'

I sent a text message to numerous friends instantly, 'Some random guy just asked me out on the street. I think he was cute. I said yes!'

So that was how it began.

A few weeks ago Laurence and I were heading out to dinner in the city. He was running a bit late and so was I and I didn't think anything of it when he sent a message saying 'can you just meet me at the corner of Swanston and Little Collins'.

You probably know what happened next.

So we got there and chatted about the day. I had bought myself a necklace (go sportsgirl) and that created a nice segue for Laurence who had also bought me a necklace ... he put it on. And asked me to marry him!!! And I said yes!

The fact we then went straight to a shoe store to replace the shoes I was wearing for the first time as both heel tips had fallen off only added to the charm of the night.

It doesn't have to be perfect to be perfect.

We both had the most exciting evening ever, beaming, drinking moet, ringing our families. We had a reservation at il bacaro, our favourite restaurant and when the maitre de overhead me telling my sister (she screamed!) there was more French champagne. We could barely eat and our faces are completely illuminated in the photos we have of the night. The waiters kept commenting on how happy we looked.

So. Much. Joy!!!

This is not the end of my story.

Two days later we were to drop our friend at the airport. We'd agreed to go to a cafe nearby to us for breakfast first and when Laurence did a u-turn in the opposite direction I reminded him of our plan.

'No' he said, decisively. 'We're going to Albert Park.' Laurence kind of loves Albert Park but it is unlike him to override the opinion of two other people.

As we drove there we passed a tram stop. An older man had clearly just collapsed and passersby were trying to assist. We pulled over. I don't know how this happened but somehow we ended up in the centre of it. By coincidence, I had just done my CPR update two weeks previously.

Like most people, I never thought I'd use it.

We did all the checks. No breathing. No heart rate that we could detect. He was already quite blue. I started compressions and there was some kind of sign of life. We put him back in recovery. I somehow then ended up on the phone. Someone had called 000 but was getting frustrated. It was all kind of hysterical.

The lady on the phone snapped me back into line and from there it was all 'you need to take control, listen to me, say this, tell them to do that, check this'. Another guy had come along and did the CPR and Laurence held the man's head and later told me he was saying prayers for him and doing his best interpretation of the last rites (he is Catholic).

This went on for twenty minutes. Finally two ambulances and a fire truck arrived and then there was defibrilation, oxygen, machines, adrenaline, everything. After twenty minutes more we had to leave - there was certainly nothing further we could do and we needed to get to the airport.

I would like to tell you there's a happy end to the story.

And we all lived happily ever after.

That is not what happened. The man died.

So far I've gone from laughing to crying in this blog post, hopefully you're faring better than me!

I want to tell you what we learnt.

The same force that created that happy synchronous event of Laurence and I meeting is the same force that brought us to that man. I believe it was his time to leave this lifetime. I believe we were meant to be there. Doing what we did but also bringing our energy to the situation.

We later found out the man was Italian (Laurence's father is Italian) and Catholic.

We refuse to see the event as a bad thing or unlucky or anything else. To torture ourselves with what ifs. If it were meant to be different, it would have been. It was enormously distressing but we talk about it, and intend to use the experience positively and to celebrate the joy of life when we can. As we all know through our various different experiences, we never know what's around the corner.

I have learnt it is possible to hold great joy and sadness in your heart at the same time. The sadness did not dim the joy but we did need to move through it, and spoke to many people to help this process.

That weekend it was like life turned the spotlight on full beam and there it was, the duality of life.

Synchronicity surrounds us if we care to pay attention

Soon after this all happened, I bought a new book, Invisible Acts of Power by Caroline Myss. I truly believe that life brings the experiences and the support we need at the time we need it. She explains her belief about the way life and synchronicity work and it closely reflects my own:

Each of us is meant to follow a particular path that reveals itself to us.

We are meant to treat our life as a journey, and at each step along that journey, we are meant to notice what is around us and act on opportunities that present themselves.

How we act - the decisions we make when we face opportunities or challenges - helps us to develop inner strength. This is how we become empowered human beings.

If we ignore everything around us, if we cover over our senses with a cloud of indifference, we'll miss the coincidences and synchronicities that signal where we are to go and what we are to do.

We have to recognise, accept and respond gratefully to these synchronicities. Becoming conscious of help that we are offered and willing to use it increases our power.

What about you, is there anything you might take from this story?

Thinking about reflecting on 2009

2009-12-16T12:02:00.008+11:00

Image: City Refraction, City Reflection by Irargerich

Totally the time to be doing end of year reflections. Yes I am thinking about it. Not yet at the action stage but these posts have helped ... give them a read and you might get inspired too...

I'll share the results of my reflections in the coming weeks ...

The Art of Noncomformity business review - Chris has been writing about his annual review process. He devoted two weeks to it this year!

Back to the source with guided remembrance - Lovely post about dealing with busyness with two great podcasts

What's your trajectory? Ok so you're busy, but are you just filling your time or moving towards something?

Annual review: Reflection and setting goals for the new year - includes a helpful Word doc you can print off for your own reflections

Victoria Shmoria's quitting the man update - Victoria shares her reflections on her first 46 days with no boss

That time of year - Jess wrote a lovely post with her reflections on the year.

Any tips on reflecting on your year? Do you have a process? Can you share any great links?

All that matters

2009-12-15T17:14:00.002+11:00

What really matters now? Check out this great free ebook from Seth Godin.

We won't run

2009-12-09T12:08:00.002+11:00

There is far to go now
Let's not waste a minute more

But oh that our eyes will be open
Oh that our eyes will be open
Oh that our eyes will be open
Oh that our eyes will be open

I just love this video clip from Sarah Blasko - magical.

This post from Jonathan Fields includes 37 other fantastic videos if you're looking for inspiration - check some of them out! I enjoyed Elizabeth Gilbert and Tony Robbins :)

Freefall

2009-11-30T21:00:00.003+11:00

freefall, originally uploaded by BotheredByBees.

Do you remember your dreams? A few years ago I saw a Clairvoyant who told me in a previous life I'd lived in Ancient Greece (or was it Egypt?) and interpreted the dreams of powerful leaders. Now I don't know if that's true or not and it barely matters ... but I do know that in recent years I've started to have dreams that are rich in symbolism, particularly in times of change.

Quite often the explanation comes as I awaken but this one didn't need too much interpretation ...

I was in a large house seeing clients ... and I knew I had to keep moving as my next client was ready for me. As I moved off to meet them I realised I was at the top of a series of huge steps suspended in the air. They were widely spaced.

To move between the steps I had to wait for a trapeze, jump onto it and then time my jump off to land on the next step and then repeat the whole process.

I was outraged.

There was a powerful lady with me (the owner of the house in my dream but I guess it was one of my guides?) and I turned to her.

"WHAT is going on? WHY do we have to take the trapeze? It is RIDICULOUS!" I told her.

"It's not SAFE!! You need to make it SAFE!"

She replied:

"Kerry, it is perfectly safe. But the more you worry about it, the more unsafe it becomes."

And as I trapezed between the steps, I realised she was right. The only times I stumbled were when I doubted.

When I just did it without thinking too much, it was easy.

What about you? Any interesting dreams to share?

Sprung

2009-11-14T09:15:00.006+11:00

sprung, originally uploaded by Robert S. Donovan.

Oh my goodness! Spring! Technically it is still here so I'd better be quick. Spring is Wood time in the Chinese Five Elements. The colour is green, the taste is sour, the emotion is anger and the climate is wind. The organs are gall bladder (planning) and wood (anger and resentment).

Wood time is about going with the flow, moving forwards, growth and change. If you're not flowing with wood time you can feel stuck ... which can lead to anger and resentment.

If your constitution is wood you will probably place a high value on what you do, particularly for work, and feel that this is who you actually are. You might overly focus on your actions and feel that your actions are who you are. Therefore you are happy with yourself when you perceive your actions are 'good' and feel annoyed with yourself when you think your actions are 'bad'.

You could have a strong sense that there is a right and a wrong way to do and to be and criticise yourself for making 'mistakes'. You might put yourself under pressure to be perfect. Having such high standards often leads to disappointment and impacts on your self esteem. You might also apply those high standards to others, inevitably feeling disappointed if they don't live up to them.

Sounds like hard work.

And remember too, this might be your overall pattern (particularly evident in times of stress) or it might just come up from time to time ... such as in Spring!

Instead of focusing on what you do, try to go beyond, to see what lies in the heart of yourself and others. Move beyond judgement and accept that you're doing the best you can and that is enough. More than enough, it is perfect. True self esteem comes from valuing what is inside. Self esteem based on what you do will only ever be a temporary solution.

We all know when we're in the flow. Things fall into place, we receive help from all angles, we have clarity and know what is right for us.

Criticising yourself, judging your actions, resenting the fact you're not moving forwards ... totally missing the point. Let go of it all now. You are acceptable already. Yes! And that stuckness? It will definitely pass.

And if you want it to move on more quickly, book a kinesiology session. Get your chi (qi - energy) flowing again!

Life is the flow of energy. It is in the air we breathe, the force that moves the weather, the force of all minds combined. It keeps the rivers flowing, our hearts beating and the sky blue ... the freedom to choose and change belongs to us.

365 Tao, p182.

Feeling stuck? Read this fabulous affirmation from Louise L Hay's 'You can Heal your Life' and get ready for change.

'Change is the natural order of my life. I welcome change. I am willing to change. I choose to change my thinking. I choose to change the thoughts I use.
I move from the old to the new with ease and joy. It is easier to forgive than I thought. Forgiving makes me feel easy and light. Forgiving makes me feel free and light. It is with joy that I learn to love myself more and more.
The more resentment I release, the more love I have to express. Changing my thoughts makes me feel good. I am learning to choose to make today a pleasure to experience.
All is well in my world.'

Read back over the other five elements:
Fire
Earth
Metal
Water

Which element do you most strongly resonate with?

Thinking it out? Forget it!

2009-10-28T22:02:00.003+11:00

Walking Cannon Beach, originally uploaded by ColbyOtero.com.

I was talking to my sister the other night. I mentioned I was busily thinking and planning about next year ... in fact, I was saying that I probably should be thinking about it a whole lot more. That would be the sensible thing to do.

My sister is doing a yoga teaching course at the moment.

She said in a recent class they did a walking meditation on the beach, with the objective being to focus on the walking and just 'be'.

She mentioned to the teacher that she likes walking because it helps her think and the teacher said ... we believe we are solving things by thinking them through ... in reality, whether we spend a lot of time and energy thinking about an issue or not ... life tends to sort itself out ... so we might as well let go of the need to intensely obsess and worry (oops, I mean think!) about things.

We confuse thinking with wisdom, 'working things out' with trusting, worrying with connecting to our inner knowing.

This is coming up for some of my clients at the moment too ... Sweet Chestnut is a Bach Flower remedy that helps dissolve highly strung mental processes. If you're a worrier/thinker, why not try reading the affirmation:

I make the commitment to kindly, gently, lovingly, and supportively trust in a higher power, accept greater capacity and grow in consciousness, beyond self made definitions and boundaries.

Ask yourself:

How might trusting in a higher power feel for me?
What self made boundaries and limitations am I placing on myself?
How might it feel to grow in consciousness and accept greater capacity?

But don't think it through ... just allow these questions to settle and take a moment to notice where it is in your body that you feel your sense of inner knowing. Feel don't think. Ohhh.

It can sometimes feel a bit, I don't know, annoying to come back to similar issues, things you think you should know ... whatever they might be for you. Nadine writes about this beautifully on her blog. The truth is ... we all have stuff, we're all working on our stuff, and really ... it's totally fine :)

What's all the fuss about stress?

2009-10-16T16:19:00.004+11:00

Peace, originally uploaded by kudumomo.

We are all aware of the toll stress can take on our lives. Stress can lead to serious illness. Our bodies are designed to deal effectively with stress - you've probably heard of the fight flight response.

The fight flight (or stress) response is a feedback loop between the hypothalamus and anterior pituitary in the brain and the adrenals (above the kidneys). This is called the HPA axis. When stress is perceived the adrenals are quickly prompted to release hormones including adrenaline and cortisol to enable the body to quickly respond to the stress. Digestion and immune function are immediately reduced so the body can take action. That’s why digestive problems and regular illness are common in highly stressed people.

The fight flight response is essential if you are in immediate danger. However in today's fast paced society, many of us activate this response constantly – even if we’re not in real danger. Work pressures, traffic, deadlines, money problems, relationship stress, the list is endless ... and the fight flight response is not designed to work continuously.

The hypothalamus, which is responsible for maintaining homeostasis (balance) in the body becomes fatigued and stops functioning efficiently. You literally become ‘out of balance’. This has a snow ball effect affecting more and more aspects of your being.

Stress is sometimes called the ‘silent killer’. You can continue to live in a stressed state quite well for some time with few health issues. Living on adrenaline becomes normal. The inevitable exhaustion is addressed with short term fixes such as more coffee, sugar hits or a glass of wine. If stress continues finally everything can seem to fall apart at once.

The many negative effects can include:
• Anxiety or panic attacks
• Mood swings
• Insomnia
• Problems with concentration and focus
• Digestion issues
• Constant colds or illnesses, or difficulty recovering from illness
• Inability to relax or enjoy life even when nothing is ‘wrong’
• Memory problems
• Ongoing overuse of the fight flight (stress) response is now recognised as a leading cause of depression

Kinesiology reduces stress and helps your body to restore homeostasis or balance.

Kinesiology helps to dissolve the stress in your system by finding the source of the stress and helping your body return to a healthy balanced state. It can also help you become more aware of the underlying factors causing your stress and help you to take positive actions to reduce the stress in your life.

Regular Kinesiology sessions are an excellent way to ensure you manage your stress levels. It is not necessary to live your life in a state of high stress and anxiety. You deserve to be happy!

On a personal note

Totally taking longer to restore balance than I expected. Still pretty tired.

On my holiday to Darwin I had a little tarot reading at the market: 'lots of good is coming but for the rest of this year ... you have to rest. You've pushed yourself too hard, you'll become unwell if you don't.' Um, hello? Boring! Wasn't that what I was doing on holiday? Wasn't that enough? I'm rested! Where's the action? I'm ready for the next thing!

Apparently not.

I've come to my senses and slowed right down. This month I stopped drinking alcohol and last week I even went off coffee (harder! I usually only have one a day but how I love that one.) Predictably, I became unwell. Two other friends who have also been through busy times and are now slowing down have had similar experiences.

My body wants rest. A lot of rest. I've tried to just go with it, cutting back where I can, getting used to the space in my life. And waiting. Just in the past couple of days a lightness is returning and with it new inspiration, new energy. But with awareness too.

I needed drive to accomplish 1400 hours of study on weekends over three years whilst working full time ... and then starting my business as soon as I had my certificate ... to get where I am. Without drive and determination I wouldn't have achieved what I have.

But I can make different choices moving forwards.

So yes, I'm continuing learning my own lessons about stress and finding balance and I am making different decisions about how much capacity I actually have. However I try to practice what I preach and I can't wait for my next Kinesiology session ... tomorrow!

Kakadu

2009-09-28T15:19:00.003+10:00

You get the best sunsets at Kakadu. Such a sacred, spiritual place.

Dust on the mirror

2009-08-21T15:39:00.004+10:00

So my yoga intensive last week was divine. And it did help me to get back on the path. Definitely some hippy and confronting moments. Staring into another person's eyes for five minutes ... someone you don't know ... is definitely an experience and following that with a five minute hug (if you feel like pulling back ... keep going!) can feel a little uncomfortable ...

The point?

We easily see the differences in others. And yet here they are, in our lives and on their own path with their own challenges ... and there is far more that is similar between us than different.

It's about noticing. Paying attention.

It reminds me of the story Kate shares on Everyday Calm. A world famous violinist played in a busy metro in Washington for one hour. He made $32. 6 people stopped to watch. The previous night he sold out a concert with tickets averaging $100.

What are we missing because we don't take the time to stop ... look ... and listen. Well, in my case, plenty.

Kate over at The Monday Project just wrote about the calm she's currently experiencing since she recently simplified her life and started paying attention to the little things. Inspiring!

What stops us from experiencing peace? Andrew described the three malas as the 'dust that clouds the mirror to our true reflection' and we spent time on the intensive looking at each one and how to move forwards when they're blocking your path. What are they?

Anava - sadness, a feeling of lack, unworthiness. Address with 'bhakti' - devotion to something bigger than yourself.

Mayiya - anger, separation, difference conflict, hatred. Work through this with self and spiritual study. Learning.

Karma - fear, anxiety, not being able to accomplish. Deal with this by taking action ... even small action.

What's holding you back from moving forwards on your path? What can you do right now to get moving again?

Yoga Girl, originally uploaded by pixieclipx.

Keeping it simple

2009-08-15T16:31:00.002+10:00

I have never really been much of a goal setter. What do I really want? What if I change my mind?

However I can see the value in goals and I've read all books and articles about the people who write their goals down being a gazillion times more likely to achieve them. In fact I have done this in the past and have been amazed to read back and see some of the things that have happened.

But it can be complicated and a bit messy to think about it all and I love the idea of a bigger, inspiring, overarching goal sitting over the top.

That's why I really liked the post on Zen Habits called really simple goal setting.

Now I haven't fully taken Leo's advice yet but he recommends reducing any goals you might have to one and turning that into a 2 - 5 word mantra. He gives you five steps for the process but breaks it down to '1) choosing a goal and creating a mantra for it; and 2) focusing on shorter-term actions to make that goal a reality.' So that means just choosing one action a day. I can totally do that!

As a starting point, I think my goal is: Integrate my passions. Does anyone else want to have a go?

Patterns, signs, yep I'm noticing!

2009-08-06T16:22:00.006+10:00

I have had a couple of experiences recently to remind me that perhaps I need to slow down a little. Of course I know this *theoretically* but it is not something I naturally do.

First of all, my brother got engaged! How exciting. A surprise to noone but me apparently. Of course I knew it would happen sometime but everyone else predicted it would happen on their holiday. Now I do live in a different state to my family however when I expressed my surprise my Mum said, 'well you are probably too busy to notice these things Kerry.' Oh.

The following day Laurence rang me around 10am. Now I did observe he left the apartment rather early but when he said 'Hi honey, I've arrived' my response was the ever so astute, 'Oh? Where are you?'

Brisbane.

I have plenty of very good reasons for my distractability. The afternoon before I travelled to Geelong for a presentation and got home just in time to log onto an online conference for work that went until 9:30. And then there's the ever present pressure of weekend study. But really. We can all find reasons to be busy.

If you have sessions over a period of time you will often notice recurring themes. It might be self esteem, communication, confidence, judgement of self or others ... for me it is that busyness and the confusion and disconnection that you ultimately create if you can't allow yourself to just be.

Surprise surprise, it is the reason I went to a Kinesiologist in the first place. In one session I've had this issue went back to between lifetimes (yes a little wacky, even for me!) I just wanted to hurry up and get started!

Sometimes we know but we don't really pay attention. Nadine wrote about this on her lovely yoga blog today. She talks about the messages her pain were giving her. In my case it's more about the messages my crazy busy lifestyle are giving me.

This is one reason I have been so drawn to Kinesiology. It always brings me back to myself. It helps me connect to my own wisdom. And whenever I am in clinic I am completely focused, centred and at peace.

And one big difference for me? Previously noticing this pattern could have been a reason to get completely upset and annoyed at myself. Now I just notice and do something about it. A much nicer experience. Havi has a whole series of posts on not hating on yourself.

I will be completely done with study at the end of this month (yipee I can't wait) but I'm really mindful that I don't want to fill the new space in my life with more busyness.

I wrote a while ago about doing the Signs and Synchronicity yoga morning intensive. And - hello sign! I found out that Andrew's doing another one next week. This time it's Progress on the Path. 'Especially for those who want to get BACK on the path'.

Ok, bring it on!

Making Space

2009-08-03T20:38:00.010+10:00

I'm decluttering! I'm doing this lovely 6 week e-course with Goddess Leonie and Lisa. It's called Making Space for your Goddess to Shine. I've never done an e-course before so it's kind of fun seeing how it all works.

Each week I get these cute books and worksheets to download and sometimes a meditation track or whatever. It's really nice having a mental focus and I definitely like the idea of making my home a space that works perfectly for me.

There are some nice floaty Goddessy bits to the course and some clean-up, tidy-up, clear-out, de-clutter type things.

I am better at the Goddess stuff.

Make an altar? Yay! Look at Feng Shui? Of course. Burn Grandfather sage (a smudge stick) throughout the house - I'd love to.

It makes such a difference too, the whole smudging thing. Definitely try it if you haven't before. So it's the sage leaves all kind of tied up with string and you just light it and I guess think clearing thoughts as you take it around the house.

Everyone commented how clean the house was. I told Laurence I'd smudged the house. He assumed it was some kind of new cleaning product along the lines of Mr Sheen.

So I'm less good at the actual de-cluttering.

Actually I was ok at the reflective parts. Why I'm holding onto things, what I want to create space for, that kind of thing. The fluffy side of de-cluttering. The non-actually-decluttering part.

Don't get me wrong, I'm quite tidy. Especially on the surface. Just don't try to look in my wardrobe (uh - kind of overflowing) or expect that I will immediately locate some essential stationery item like a stapler.

I promise I'll work on it, there's still a few weeks to go :)

Lucky

2009-07-18T14:45:00.005+10:00

Last week I had to do a presentation for a conference, something I do semi-regularly. I always present on the same kinds of things - using online technologies, including blogging, for education.

But I was nervous.

There were a few rational reasons for this. For one it was a national conference. I even ignored the first couple of emails requesting that I present since it sounded a bit too intimidating! But in the end I was talked into it. Also, I hadn't presented in while so I thought maybe that's why I was a little anxious.

Anyway, with a half an hour to go before I had to leave the office I decided (last resort!) to listen to a free meditation track from Havi. Give it a listen!

You go through this process of imagining your brain as a computer and looking at the programs it's running for eg worry and then stopping them and changing the program.

So anyways, it probably all sounds a bit woo woo and meanwhile I was only half paying attention as I was trying to work at the same time.

Then, at around minute 14, right after we looked at self doubt and dissolving that, I felt a whole lot calmer. I suddenly knew I had to check my presentation.

It had completely corrupted!!!

Half the pages were deleted and big red cross marks where images had been on others. I have never seen anything like it. And just enough time to save another copy and get going. Anyway, presentation is here if you're interested. All a little bizarre.

So, what about you? Any stories of being saved by your intuition lately? Please share!

Sacral Chakra

2009-07-09T21:37:00.008+10:00

Have you ever noticed what happens when you try to ignore an issue? It gets bigger and more obvious and annoying until you decide to to something about it! So this was happening to me and I couldn't figure out why. And then tonight I clicked.

It's mostly sacral chakra stuff. I realised that I've been putting off adding the sacral chakra practice to my blog. Why is that? Is it because I've subconsciously been avoiding looking at those issues? Not wanting to finish what I've started? Well who knows but I'm not avoiding any longer! Enough already.

The sacral chakra is orange and related to issues around relationships, passion, creativity and the integration of opposites - eg male/female, yin/yang. It's about being able to have intimacy but also appropriate boundaries. If blocked or congested you might have problems connecting to others, feeling intimacy or have a block to your creativity ... you might not be able to finish the things that you start.

Questions

Can I be close to others - am I able to express intimacy?
Can I express my creativity?
Am I able to start and finish tasks?
Am I comfortable with my boundaries?

You might like to choose one or more that jumps out at you and reflect on or write your responses. Then slowly and mindfully work through each of these asanas, with five breaths in each. They have a hip opening effect. Pictures if needed.
Yoga Postures
Warrior pose II (virabhadrasana II) - a side lunge with arms outstretched parallel to the floor
Triangle pose (trikonasana) - legs are wider than hip width, point one foot away and the arm on the same side goes down to meet the foot (don't over stretch) - the other arm stretches directly upwards (so that your arms are in a straight line)
Fan pose (prasarita padottanasana) - feet are still wider than hip width, feet parallel. Start with hands on hips, breathe in and look up, breathe out and move down towards the floor. Take hands off your hips and touch the floor allowing the head to hang down
Seated wide angle pose (upavista konasana) - sitting down with legs stretched out to the side and arms outstretched in front of you
Seated spinal twist (ardha matsyendrasana) - start with your legs in front of you. Bend one leg and place the foot over the top of the other leg so that you start to move into a twist. Hold your knee with the opposite arm and twist with your other hand behind you
Meditation

Sit in a crossed legs position. Bring hands out to the sides at a lower angle to the base chakra meditation, elbows bent, with the palms of the hands facing each other. Hands are at a 60 degree angle, facing outwards. Bring hands closer together without touching, like a clap, tensing the inner organs at the same time. Release, and move back to the starting position.
Chant/mantra: Ek ong kar sat gur prasad (says to listen to this on a tape but try chanting it and then doing chop movement and chanting it again when hands come back to start position?)
Mantra meaning: There is only one Creator who is realised by His grace
And of course a Kinesiology session is always a good way to work on chakra issues.

Base Chakra practice

But, is it a sign?

2009-07-07T09:32:00.005+10:00

The external world is remarkably consistent, and yet we blame it for what's going on inside of us. People who think the world is going to end always manage to find a new thing that's going to cause it to end.
People itching to be bummed out all day long will certainly find an external event that give their emotion some causal cover. The thinking happens long before the event that we blame the thinking on.

How true is this! Go to Seth's blog to read more. Isn't it interesting that we are always looking to change the world around us. It's our situation that needs to change, other people, certain events. I talked about that a bit here.

What are you feeling now?

Nurture your feelings and be aware ... you are probably going to create events today that support how you're feeling right now.

But, is it a sign?, originally uploaded by Erik Charlton.

Homeopathics to the rescue

2009-07-06T08:56:00.010+10:00

This is so funny! Kinesiology, Homeopathy and other therapies should defnitely be regarded as Complementary rather than Alternative to Western Medicine.

Trust me, if I had a car accident and ended up in A&E I do want surgery if I need it ... not flower essences and crystals!

Thanks to my colleague for this video :)

Clearing obstacles

2009-06-29T19:52:00.004+10:00

Ganesha, the Hindi god, is the destroyer! The clearer of obstacles and provider of protection and guidance. Also: the lord of success.

I had a Kinesiology session on Saturday and pulled the Ganesha card from my Gaia oracle after I got home. An omen of good forture apparently this means 'whatever has thwarted your progress or prevented you moving forward will soon be resolved.' I think that is so symbolic of exactly what Kinesiology can do ... clearing obstacles, sabotages, blockages and fears, both conscious and subconscious. And allowing you the freedom to move forwards feeling calm and confident ... to achieve more than you'd dared dream!

What are you struggling with right now? In what ways are you feeling limited? Are you feeling fulfilled? Living your dreams? Or is that 'unrealistic'? Go within and listen. Here's the affirmation that comes with the card, why not say it yourself and make a wish ...

'I am protected and guided by a higher power

When the path is blocked, I take this as a sign to wait

I give thanks for divine intervention

When the path is clear, I move forward with ease

All that does or does not occur is for my highest good'

Holes

2009-06-26T17:18:00.002+10:00

I still remember a story told by a yoga teacher in my ashtanga class a few years ago. It was a story about holes. She compared looking for clarity or change or personal growth to digging holes in the backyard looking for water.

We start. Soon we are bored. Clearly there is no water in this hole. So we start to dig another hole. Same thing. We can go on like this forever. We will never find water. However if we continued digging the same hole, no matter how we felt about it to start with, eventually we would get to water.

How can you do this? There are infinite ways. Kinesiology is one good one. In many ways it probably doesn't really matter which one you choose. Trust your instincts and intuition. You will know the right path for you.

Say not "I have found the truth,"
But rather, "I have found a truth"
Say not, "I have found the path of the soul"
Say rather, "I have met the soul walking upon my path"
For the soul walks upon all paths
The Prophet,
Kahil Gibran

A committed approach makes the difference. I floated around with lots of bits and pieces of personal development type stuff for years. And my results reflected that. An endless cycle of kind of better but not really.

But in the end I really wanted results. I was sick of my stuff. I started going to yoga a couple of times a week. And I started seeing a Kinesiologist and went regularly (every few weeks and then once a month). And guess what, my life completely changed. And this is what I observe in my practice. Committed people create amazing change.

I think it's being willing and ready to change that makes the difference. Sometimes a little bit of luck and synchronicity help too :)

Image: holes, originally uploaded by BarelyFitz.

Finding Happiness

2009-06-23T17:54:00.006+10:00

How easy is it to find happiness? What is it that you really need? I love this talk from Dan Gilbert. Here are some of his suggestions for achieving happiness ...

accrue wealth, power and prestige and lose it
spend as much of your life as you can in prison
make someone else really, really rich
never, ever join the beatles

You might have to watch the talk to get it!

On a similar theme, I liked what Chris Guillebeau wrote about all the things you don't need to be happy on his blog today. I particularly love the four things he says you do need. Especially the two answers. What are yours?

You need passion. You need to be absolutely passionate about what you believe in. If you don’t feel passionate about something, chances are you haven’t discovered it yet. Keep looking.
You need a vision and a task. The vision tells you where you are going; the task tells you what to do next.
You need the two answers. What do you really want to get out of life? How can you help others in a way that is unique to you?
You need commitment to stay the course. Most people give up at 5,000 hours; the winners continue to 10,000 and beyond. I liked what Seth said about the 3,000 posts he’s written: the first 2,500 were the hardest.

Go read the rest! Do you agree? What do you think is necessary for happiness? I would say love is most important for me ... or at least self acceptance. I'm not so sure about the vision and task ... especially the task, it sounds like work! I'll need to reflect on that some more. Certainly a sense of a higher purpose or destiny helps ... interestingly that has been coming up for a lot of clients recently.

The thing that I'm learning is that it's not always tied to what you're doing. It's so easy to get stuck on thinking 'I need to know my purpose' or 'I'll feel happy when ...' or whatever. Maybe your purpose is doing what you're doing right now in the most beautiful way possible! And you're missing it because you're too busy worrying about it!

Base Chakra

2009-06-16T16:17:00.004+10:00

The base chakra is red and located at the base of your spine ... it relates to issues of survival, safety and security and this includes our relationship to our family (or 'tribe'), money, work, housing and other life essentials. With a strong base chakra you generally feel secure and supported and can put in the hard work required to make your dreams a reality. It is about feeling grounded - essential to everything else in life!

Questions:

Do I feel in control of my life?
Do I feel grounded?
How is my home life? Do I feel safe, secure and happy at home?
How are my finances?
Am I creating what I want in my life?

Mountain pose (tadasana) - stand tall with feet parallel
High lunge (alana) - one foot is forward in a lunge position and hands above the head
Chair pose (ukatasana) - hands are upwards and parallel and knees bent into seated position
Tree pose (vrksasana) - sole of one foot rests on the inner leg (lower down is easier, higher up is harder) and hands are in prayer pose
Warrior pose III (virabhadrasana III) - kind of like a plane. Arms out to side and one foot outstretched behind you

Meditation:

Sitting with legs crossed. Arms are held in front of body as if holding a large box from the sides. Palms should be facing towards each other and elbows bent at 60 degrees. Focus eyes on tip of nose.

Chant ‘Hummee hum’ whilst at the same time moving the hands in a chopping motion towards each other and slightly down. Chant ‘Brahm hum’ whilst doing a second chopping motion, bringing the hands almost to touching. Continue for several minutes.

Mantra meaning: ‘Hummee hum brahm hum’ means ‘we are we and we are one’ (we are already everything we need to be).

Allow yourself to sit in silence for several minutes reflecting on your original question. See what comes.

Chakra practice

2009-06-16T15:27:00.007+10:00

“I have so much to do today that I’m going to meditate for two hours instead of one” Gandhi.

I found this quote on the Quiet Mind Meditation blog today (go read what she wrote about it, interesting!) and thought isn't that so true ... whenever we're busy we think we can't possibly fit in time for meditation/yoga/whatever it is that will actually help us create some balance ... when in reality it would help us do everything else so much more easily.

Anyway, I do still struggle sometimes so join in with me and we can work through our issues together!

So I have put together a practice for each of the chakras including some questions to reflect on (either mentally or you could write your responses) to help tune you into the issues of the chakra and then some yoga asanas and meditation practices to help balance the chakra. See how you go.

Try each practice as many times as you wish. You can reflect on a different question each time. It should only take 15 - 20 minutes, depending on how long you spend in meditation. And we truly do all have 15 minutes in our day if we want to find it!

This might inspire you. When you practice meditation over a number of years you begin to open the chakras naturally and that releases some of the stressors held in each.

'You become aware of the emotional and spiritual lessons necessary to the proper functioning of that chakra ... the conscious personality begins to understand the reason for existing blockages'

Richard Gerber - Vibrational Medicine

However the conscious mind has a part to play! So that's why I'll include some reflective questions. And yoga helps to physically realign the body and allow energy to flow freely. Different yoga asanas help release blocks associated with each of the chakras too. You can find some pictures and descriptions of asanas here if you need them.

Remember this:

'Integration of mind, body and spirit makes healing possible. It is not enough to merely understand without action or to merely move energy without understanding. It is the integration of these two currents that creates the changes we see in our lives'

Anodea Judith - Eastern Body, Western Mind

I'll put up a new practice each week. If you do try it - even once - join the discussion and let us know how it went for you :)

* Meditation practices are variations from 'Meditation as Medicine' by Dharma Khalsa - recommended!

The world of water

2009-06-08T11:31:00.007+10:00

The world of water, originally uploaded by Snap®.

Winter is Water element time! In Winter things start to slow down and it's a time where we can conserve our energies and build up our reserves ready for the action and activity of Spring. This can feel uneasy and bring up a lot of fears and anxiety. The water element is all about the balance between our fears and trust, particularly in our own intuition.

The water element is the colour blue and relates to the kidneys (fears) and bladder (control of the external environment). The sense is hearing, the smell is putrid and the taste is salty.

As with all the five element patterns, you might be primarily that constitutional type or it might be an imbalanced pattern you fall into at a particular time in relation to certain issues. The water element relates to your feelings about your potential and destiny. Do you feel like you need to achieve your inner potential no matter what? Or is your destiny out of your control and down to fate?

The pattern of the Water element type is to try and control your fear and anxiety. This can make you react in two main ways. You might be completely driven. You feel like you can never stop and rest - that you MUST keep going no matter what ... even though deep down you know it's not doing you much good. If you're like this the idea that you're racing around because you're 'afraid' is probably horrifying to you! It's not that! It's just that you have so much to doooo, and besides, you'l be able to relax once you have sorted out that job or house/have enough money/know what's going to happen next.

The other option is to freeze or hide away. You might feel that you have no real control over your life, that fate will decide what happens. When things start to get challenging you begin to withdraw ... from yourself and everyone else and go inwards to worry. Once again - you'll probably deny that too!

If you're a water type person you're probably clever ... and think a lot. In balance you might be very intuitive and have great instincts that you know you can rely on. You have an inner sense of safety and security and use your wisdom wisely.

The water pattern is never more obvious than when you are faced with either the slowing down of life as we move into Winter ... or dealing with unexpected new events that are out of your control. How do you feel? If panic and anxiety come up remember ... go inside rather than reacting to fear. Meditate. Breathe. Connect to your instincts and intuition. The answers are always within you.

This post is part of a series on the five elements. Why not go back and read about Fire, Earth and Metal. The final part - Wood - will come in Spring. Do you particularly identify with one of the elements?

Chakras

2009-06-01T16:58:00.009+10:00

So I've been doing some research on the chakras, yoga and sadhana - which is basically a daily practice that is ideally done early in the morning. Every night I fully intend to get up for this and every morning I think ten more minutes sleep (and then ten more) is just what I need. But I'm really going to try.

This is what Claire East who wrote 'Chakras for the 21st century' has to say about chakras:

‘Chakra is a sanskrit word meaning ‘wheel’ or ‘circle’. Each chakra is an energy centre, a vortex that draws spiritual energy into our self. Chakras are spiritual centres of light held within our energy field, within our aura.’

You probably know there are seven main chakras and there are particular issues that relate to each one. You might not be aware there are also specific glands and hormones connected to each. The chakra system kind of acts as an interface between the physical and etheric body. For example your hormones can affect your emotions via the chakra system ... and vice-versa.

According to Anodea Judith who wrote 'Eastern Body, Western Mind' our chakras affect:

‘Glandular processes, body shape, chronic physical ailments, thoughts, and behaviour. By using techniques such as yoga, breathing, bioenergetics, physical exercises, meditation, and visualisation we can … influence our chakras, our health and our lives.’

That is a lot of stuff! If you're not the quotey type, she's just saying that the chakras affect lots of stuff on a physical and emotional level and by using yoga, meditation and other tools - you can actually balance the chakras yourself.

So I'm going to share the practices I collected and came up with in a bit of a chakra series. That way you can join in with me. I mean - if you're doing it, I will totally have to. I'll start with the Base chakra very soon.

ALSO - it's now Winter! And Winter means Water time according to the Chinese five elements. Water is all about FEAR ... and also intuition. Can you slow down to meet the season ... and go within ... without panicking that everything is stopping? Can you let go of control? More on water in my five element series soon.

The awesome blogs edition

2009-05-30T14:36:00.004+10:00

So, lucky me! I was awarded the Awe-Summ!!!! award by the lovely Yvonne from Safe Space and I must list 7 things about myself which make me Awesome. Thank you so much Yvonne, that is so sweet. Needless to say, I love the Safe Space blog.

Item! This has brought up some stuff for me! Interesting. Of course I could easily identify the top 7 awesome things about my favourite ... say 100 people or so. But identifying them for myself. Well, that feels a little uncomfortable!

Apparently it is perfectly appropriate that the clients I see should love and accept themselves unconditionally ... and I of course believe I should too ... but talking about it? To others? In public???

Really happy about the bit where I talk about seven blogs that I like. Having been meaning to do that anyway. Perhaps I'll do that first (whilst taking deep breaths).

The Fluent Self - I really like Havi's blog ... she's a life coach specialising in - wait for it -destuckification!! and always has some great wisdom to share and is really courageous and open about her 'stuff'. Love her writing style and general wackiness. If you write a blog, you might like this post she wrote about finding your 'voice'. I just found it last week. Helpful!

The Art of Non-Conformity - if you've ever thought about how fab it would be to quit your job and travel for a living, visit Chris' blog. He also has these awesome free products that you should download immediately: 279 days to overnight success and the Brief Guide to World Domination. The thing I like about Chris is that he is so amazingly honest and ethical. Like he creates a product to sell and then gives you about ten reasons why it might not be right for you and why you shouldn't buy it. But he still makes a living out if this blogging thing, so clearly he's doing something right :)

Jesse's Mess - totally gorgeous and creative, Jess shares some of her lovely art on here. A woman of many talents, she's a great Kinesiologist too.

Auric Fields - Amanda is my Kinesiologist! And she's awesome, clearly, since I've been seeing her for about four years. Sometimes I think I should try another Kinesiologist just for research purposes. But I never get around to it. I think you should be the client you want to attract. And I do, yay.

Vibrant Living Wellness - Kristen is another Kinesiologist. We're twitter friends! She's writing a fab series about her chakra journey at the moment.

Monday Project - cute idea! Creative musings from friends based in Sydney and Melbourne who work on a project a month and invite others to join in.

Zen Habits - read by about a gallion people, always something to inspire.

Well. That was fun! Ok, so let's do this thing.

I am fab at taking action.
I'm sooo happy that I've passed through that depression stuff that plagued me during my teens and twenties. I'm good at growing and learning about myself.
I care for myself. I am gentle with myself. That might not sound huge but after years of criticising and judging myself, it is a big thing.
I'm a caring friend and girlfriend.
I like writing. And I'm happy with the blogging thing. I'm glad that I write my blog even though I'm soooo busy!!!
I am supportive of others.
I'm good at working with people who are anxious and stressed and stuck on stuff. I'm an expert on that! And I think it's what I'm meant to do :)

Below are the rules and guidelines to the Awe-summm award:

* List 7 things that make you Awe-Summm and then pass the award on to 7 bloggers you love.

* Make sure to tag your recipients and let them know they have won!

* And finally link back to the blogger that tagged you.

Freedom

2009-05-29T15:58:00.004+10:00

Freedom, originally uploaded by kudumomo.

A little disappointed I've been MIA from my blog recently ... busyness is to blame, unavoidable this time ... but things will settle down soon! This I hope. I had a Kinesiology session of my own today and it came up that I'm living four months in the future ... and disbelieving that things will be calmer and more relaxed. What an unhelpful belief!

So we've obviously worked on that energetically, I'll do some reflection over the next few days and I have an essence to take for my Solar Plexus chakra (confidence, self esteem, will and positivity moving forwards).

Sometimes the issues we're dealing with seem unavoidable ... and the mind loves to label and project to some time in the future when 'things will be different'. Maybe they will!

But all we ever have is the now.

‘The present moment is sometimes unacceptable, unpleasant or awful. It is as it is. Observe how the mind labels it and how this labelling process, this continuous sitting in judgement, creates pain and unhappiness. By watching the mechanics of the mind, you step out of its resistance patterns, and you can then allow the present moment to be.

This will give you a taste of the inner state of freedom from external conditions, the state of true inner peace. Then see what happens, and take action if necessary or possible.

Accept – then act.

Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it. Always work with it, not against it. Make it your friend and ally, not your enemy. This will miraculously transform your whole life,’

The Power of Now, Eckhart Tolle, p36.

Surrendering to emotion

2009-05-13T10:23:00.004+10:00

Emotion, originally uploaded by BdwayDiva1.

'When you surrender and welcome any emotion that is present within you, something magical happens and suddenly it has the ability to pass through you.

It is only when you resist and fight against a mood or emotion, or think it shouldn't be there, that it gains power and the feelings intensify'

The best year of your life, Debbie Ford

Sometimes when we experience challenges we can think that there is strenth in resisting how we feel. How are you? Oh fine. It's not really that bad. I don't mind. I'm going to push through and just get over it ... I'm being POSITIVE!!!

Often in clinic, I find that people underestimate how much stress is affecting them. Rate it out of ten? Oh about 6. Really, that's interesting, your body says 9/10.

This is something I do myself. I remember when I started seeing my Kinesiologist and it 'came up' that I only thought it was ok to feel happy emotions and thought I should feel positive all the time. I was like, 'yes. That's exactly what I think.' Although I had some inkling this wasn't logical, I wasn't yet ready to realise that there are no bad emotions - and that by acknowledging and allowing them, they in fact lose power over you!

We don't always 'hear' the message our body/subconscious is telling us at the time, this is why I often say ... just see if something comes to you later.

It wasn't until I started studying Kinesiology myself that I noticed that some people were comfortable really exploring their 'weak spots', powerful emotions (not always the happy ones!) or the 'monsters under the bed that get bigger because you don't want to look at them' (as our lecturer used to say). They were getting amazing results and moving forwards. By confronting their pain, they were transforming. I started to get it.

Denial of your emotions is not equivalent to strength.

Oh That Body Language!

2009-05-11T17:11:00.004+10:00

Oh That Body Language!, originally uploaded by malias.

I'm going to a yoga intensive with Andrew at Divine Grace in the mornings this week and the theme is synchronicity ...

After doing a series of quite hippy exercises and yoga postures with a partner to develop and show trust we started to share something about ourselves.

Turns out my partner had the same star sign ... and birth DATE and the same occupation. Well at least - she is a teacher and I used to be.

Isn't it funny how when you start to look for synchronicity it's everywhere.

I'm still amazed that I met my boyfriend (who I've never known to take public transport in the three years I've known him) on a tram. Why that day, that time, that tram?

The Pond - a metaphor for meditation

2009-05-03T22:39:00.008+10:00

I'm kind of interested in meditation but isn't it just sitting quietly and thinking and what is the point of that anyway??

We had this discussion at Book Club when talking about 'Eat, Pray, Love' and it reminded me of the metaphor of 'The Pond' by Wayne Dyer, as explained in 'Your Sacred Self'. I love Wayne Dyer and have been reading his books since I was about 15 ... here is my interpretation.

So, The Pond.

Level One: The Surface

So this is where all the disturbances are ... the wind churns, the leaves mess, the rain pelts, the storms cause it to be violent. It's the 'chatter'. The mind reminding of all the stuff we need to remember and do and think about (almost like it will make a difference). Money, deadlines, health, work, appointments, family, holidays, arguments, movies you want to see, your cough, your car ... the daily stuff of life that flickers across your mind. No problems with any of it but totally exhausting to live here all the time (and a bit dull too). This is the stuff we think about because we think we don't have a choice. You totally do. Let's go deeper.

Level Two: Just Below the Surface

Yep you've let the chatter behind. And now you're analysing. Why did that happen, what was the reason, why does he/she think that way???? Oh you're such a thinker, and so deep. I get a bit stuck here sometimes. At this level you are constantly observing, commenting on and judging everything that happens. You know that if you can figure things out you will totally be able to relax. Only you never quite get to that point. Ok so stop trying to work it all out for a sec and let's try the next layer.

Level Three: Well Below the Surface

Now things are actually starting to get a bit more relaxing. Rather than analysing, you're starting to piece things together. The pattern is emerging, connections are taking place and things are beginning to make sense. You know you can't figure it all out ... but somehow that isn't important anymore and you're happy to just be with it all. Ahhh (in a good way).

Level Four: Stillness in Bliss

The thoughts are starting to slow right down and awareness is taking their place. You feel more silent and quiet and joy starts to come in. Oh ... so this is meditation! All the chatter, analysing and even the coming together of everything is left behind ... you just are.

Level Five: The Field of All Possibilities

Beneath all of that is the experience of everything and nothing and finding what is at the centre of your being.

Exciting!

Image: Rainbow Over Pond, originally uploaded by Frazzled Jen.

Kinesiology and the subconscious mind

2009-05-02T18:05:00.009+10:00

So ... tell me again how you know that stuff about me ... are you psychic or something?

No!

Basically, when I'm muscle monitoring during a session, I'm asking your body or your subconscious mind what is going on, what is affected and what it needs to solve the problem.

The great news for you is that you don't need to know exactly what's going on, why you feel the way you do or what you want/need to do about it. Your body does! And I can communicate with it! Yay!

All you need is an open mind and a willingness to change/make connections/deal with your stuff. Because we all have stuff!

The first time you find out your body is eg seething with anger about a particular issue you don't even want to think about it can feel a little confronting. After that, it's kind of fun. Seething huh, well that's not really a word I would use but come to think of it I was a little annoyed. Guess it affected me more than I thought!

So why is it useful to work with the subconscious mind? Well ... have you ever tried to 'think happy thoughts' or said affirmations and then wondered why things don't really change? It's probably because you're only working with the conscious mind ...

‘If the desires of the conscious mind conflict with the programs of the subconscious mind, which “mind” do you think will win out?

You can repeat the positive affirmation that you are lovable over and over or that your cancer tumour will shrink.

But if, as a child, you heard over and over that you are worthless and sickly, those messages programmed into your subconscious mind will undermine your best conscious efforts to change your life’

The Biology of Belief, Bruce Lipton PhD

Pretty interesting huh! So that's why Kinesiology is so effective for goal setting.

Simple things

2009-04-28T21:09:00.006+10:00

I decided to go looking for a teapot yesterday because I was meeting up with Yvonne and I really felt like tea. I'm not usually much of a tea drinker but I've also got some lovely tea leaves my friend Elena brought me back from her recent sojourn to Japan so a teapot is clearly needed.

Yesterday I started talking about my need for a teapot at work. Where on earth do you buy a teapot? Jo suggested Craft Victoria and whilst their teapots are divine, they are really pieces of artwork so not really in my price/need range. The nearest Tea Too store is blocks away (maybe 5) and yesterday was freezing so I turned back after two.

So much for commitment to my teapot.

When I got back to work Jo asked what kind of teapot I want (who knows? What kinds are there? A pretty one?) and told me she actually has five. Including one nice red one that she never uses and did I want it. Oh my goodness, yes I do!

So she brought it today and here is my new teapot and my lovely Japanese tea. I am so happy!

And you've got to love a boyfriend who, when he witnesses you lining up a mobile phone shot of a teapot says, hang on a sec, I'll get you some light!!

All I need now is a strainer so I'm not drinking leaves along with the tea.

* Clearly I didn't have a teapot last night. So Yvonne and I had a 'tea bag' tea and then went to the Exchange for a couple of glasses of vino instead :)

Ode to my Nanna

2009-04-23T22:47:00.014+10:00

Mum, Nanna and me.

My sis, grandparents, cousins and brother.

So I do love my Nanna very much. Nanna just turned 80 and I went back to country South Australia last weekend to help her celebrate and gave a speech. The party had a theme of blue. My Nanna, in her darling and eccentric way, only wears blue. Never yellow, which she hates and claims makes her ill.

I should briefly talk about the party itself - at the 'Tarlee Institute' with nearly 100 people and a band mind you. Ah, the organisation. For those not from the country, this entails much preparation of the kind we cannot really even imagine. When I say we I mean you, however rest assured I don't get it either.

I'm talking 'mock chicken' sandwiches - a recipe bizarrely involving tomato, cheese and egg (sounds revolting but really quite nice - sorry Mum), caramel slice, 'butterfly cakes' with whipped cream and copious other recipes, a band playing the 'military two step' and the 'pride of erin' and a million blown up balloons.

I started my speech with a quote, which appeared on the date of Nanna's birthday (19th April) on a 'quote of the day' calendar of my Mum's.

'Growing old is compulsary. Growing up is optional.'

Words to live by? My Nanna is one of those people who will never grow up. She was unwell the day before her party and ended spending the night in hospital. However, annoying and stressful though this was, noone would have known. She somehow even persuaded the doctor to do early rounds so she could get to her hair appointment on time - I think it was something to do with the compliments she gives him about his 'nice shirts' and 'good injection technique' - which he apparently doesn't even have, but Nanna can make anyone feel good about themselves.

Nanna is the great provider and can always be counted on for any kind of food including her 'world famous' brandy snaps, or a lolly, which she'll find for you somewhere in the depths of her handbag. Apparently she got into trouble at bowls for giving lollies to the opposition - we should all be so evil :)

And that is how I ended my speech, that noone can leave Nanna's presence without feeling more beautiful, talented, clever (deep breath) , kind or brave as Nanna always has the right thing to say to everyone. So that kind of gave me a tear just writing it the first time, then giving the speech and even now.

In fact the next day, at a lunch for her actual birthday, she said that after my speech a number of people commented to her how close she was to her eldest grand daughter and that was it - I burst into tears. And then my Poppa, who is not the same these days, stroked my arm with such compassionate, unconditional and understanding love that it made me cry even more (v. embarrassing)

When I arrived back in Melbourne I picked a book off my shelf, 'The Prophet' by Kahil Gibran and it opened to a page on 'joy and sorrow' ...

'Your joy is your sorrow unmasked
And the selfsame well form which your laughter rises was often times filled with your tears
And how else can it be?
The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain
Is it not the cup that holds your wine the very cup that was burned in the potter's oven?
And is it not the lute that soothes your spirit the very wood that was hollowed with knives?
When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorry that is giving you joy.
When you are sorrowful ... look into your heart, and you will see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight'

I'm sort of annoyed at myself for being upset without reason, I know how lucky I am to still have ALL my grandparents (the other pair are now in their 90s and very healthy) but it's really the joy and sorrow getting all mixed up together ...

What is the difference between genius and madness?

2009-04-23T13:47:00.007+10:00

What do you think? When thinking about this question for work I immediately thought of David Helfgott; a brilliant musician driven mad by his own genius. I found watching these clips from the movie Shine quite emotional.

And then a few days ago I found out David Helfgott is actually coming to Melbourne in August. So Laurence and I have booked! I love it when that happens, I mean I haven't thought about that movie in years. Have a quick watch!

Along a similar vein, if you haven't seen a clip of Susan Boyle in 'Britain's Got Talent' you totally have to watch it now. Pretty inspirational!

Another doorway

2009-04-11T11:37:00.004+10:00

Things are sorting themselves out, as they do.

Although nothing is set in stone, it looks like I will be able to move to official part time work (0.8) and continue my Kinesiology practice :)

I wonder if you'll see the irony that the woman I will hopefully job share with is a Kinesiology client of mine ... and the person who introduced me to blogging in the first place. And I don't really mean the mechanics of type and hit publish, I mean the point to it all, which I'm still exploring.

I wrote about the big talk I had to do recently. Well the keynote was Will Richardson speaking on web 2.0 and blogging. I think I 'get' web 2.0 and in fact that is a big part of what I speak about to teachers. But I get it a whole lot more since, and I've thought a lot about his message, part of which was

"an important value of writing today is not simply to communicate but to get others engaged, to build a larger conversation around what we write"

Maybe that sounds obvious to you but I had an aha moment. I've also been thinking about something Lauren O'Grady blogged,

"You can only be one person online"

And since then I've been merging my worlds a little. Will also said, if you don't feel a moment's hesitation before you hit publish, don't bother. I hear you Will...

(Image Another doorway, by kimba)

Kinesiology unplugged

2009-04-07T12:35:00.002+10:00

The Australian Kinesiology Association has quite a good definition of Kinesiology, I used some of their words to create this worlde. It's always interesting seeing which words dominate ... in this case, stress, experience, muscle, balance, energy ... Make your own here!

5 Elements

2009-04-06T20:42:00.004+10:00

A simple video explaining the Chinese five elements. The five elements are really important to Kinesiology and can provide some clues to particular patterns of imbalance. A client recently said, 'I don't understand how you knew to ask the right questions.' Of course this is training and practise but we also learn communications/counselling techniques which are based on an understanding of the five elements and this can help us to hone in on the 'issues behind the issue'. I summarised the five elements here a while ago.

Why Awaken?

2009-04-05T17:02:00.006+10:00

Cosmos Flower, originally uploaded by aussiegall.

How many people would say that an encounter with a clairvoyant inspired their business name? Probably not very many.

I've only seen one clairvoyant and it was a few years ago, right before I started studying Kinesiology.

When describing what she saw me doing in the future she didn't say what it was exactly (no surprises there, many people haven't heard of Kinesiology!), just that it was 'on an awakening theme, bringing people self knowledge and understanding'.

I started the course within a few weeks and I knew right from the start that my business name would be Awaken Kinesiology.

Helping people to awaken to themselves, find self acceptance and move forwards with clarity is one of the most rewarding aspects of my work.

On being grateful

2009-04-04T12:14:00.009+11:00

So I have some very clever and wonderful friends. First of all Jess, who created my website in the first place and now Lynn and her housie Pete, who have done a bit of a re-modelling and even incorporated the blog into the site ... very clever! You can click on the images to have a look. Although I think they're still testing so don't worry if you run into difficulty :)

I have been so blessed with help to get things started ... and now so much encouragement to continue in spite of swhat we might term 'timetabling issues' that I really must stop and express my gratitude.

And I'm reminded of a quote that is probably Taoist in origin ... 'we don't always get what we want but we always get what we need.'

Balance

2009-04-02T17:29:00.007+11:00

Balance, originally uploaded by Pink Sherbet Photography.

And so I'm getting the opportunity to learn a little more about balance ...

My regular work is suddenly busier which means I'm no longer able to take Wednesday's off for my Kinesiology practice which has been going so well.

Hopefully I'll be able to do every second Friday instead ...

I pulled a 'Tao' card earlier this week on limitation ... focusing on our response to limitation and how we can use this as an opportunity to build our energy and grow rather than fighting against it. :)

Stories we tell ourselves

2009-03-27T14:06:00.006+11:00

I was inspired by this post by Yvonne today, here's part of it...

We all carry around a story by which our lives are defined:
-I'm like this because...(enter story)
-It's all because I was...(enter story)
-I do things this way because...(enter story)
-I'll never be...because...(enter story)
-People don't like me because...(enter story)

It's true that we love our stories! In fact when I had a Kinesiology session of my own last week I broke into a bit of a 'story' to explain something or other and the Kinesiologist said 'I don't want the story, I want the truth!'

I was using a story as avoidance without even realising. Talk about a shock!

Breaking free of the story can bring a lot of freedom and I'm grateful I was confronted about it. Yvonne has a great exercise on her site I want to try - check it out!

My friend Jas picked up a great quote from a workshop she did, 'Is that true, or is it just a story you tell yourself?'

What stories are you telling yourself?

Poetry at PicLits

2009-03-23T17:20:00.003+11:00

See the full PicLit at PicLits.com

So this is where my world's collide ... I shared this site, amongst other things (PicLits, not my blog!) at an eLearning conference I spoke at today ... to 170 people. Eek. Rescue Remedy anyone??

I have been intrigued at the way I'm being guided/pushed/prompted by the universe to develop this area further. Quite frankly I was just happy to get over my initial fear of public speaking last year. And now I seem to be progressively presenting to larger groups and for longer periods. I just seem to keep saying 'yes'. And of course it's fine.

Embracing the unknown is not always easy!

Anyway, PicLits is such a lovely site - like magnetic poetry! Choose a picture and then drag and drop words to create your own poem. You'll have to click on the picture to read mine ...

Try it, it makes you feel good :)

Letting go

2009-03-14T14:25:00.006+11:00

Autumn has arrived! As the leaves begin to change colours over the next few months and fall to the ground will you...

be upset?
feel annoyed or frustrated with the tree?
try to change the speed of the leaves falling and make it happen more quickly ... or try and reattach the fallen leaves?
angrily point out that the leaves dropped last year and every year before that and is therefore unecessary?
feel like this is the end of ALL LEAVES...?

How ridiculous, right?

And yet when it comes to situations in our lives and the realisation we need to change old attitudes, beliefs, habits, behaviours, etc to move forwards, how often do we do these very things?

We might feel upset, angry or frustrated about the situation or ourselves, resentful we even have to deal with it, feel annoyed we have to continue to look at some of the same issues, wish it would happen faster/slower and feel like it's the END OF THE WORLD.

We accept the leaves will change and fall and that there is a reason for this ... to rest over the winter and to allow new life (attitudes, beliefs, habits, behaviours) to blossom. The tree can't hold onto the old leaves and create new buds at the same time!

In Chinese Medicine Autumn relates to the Metal element. With our lungs we take in and let go of air (life). Lungs relate to grief whilst the Large Intestines are to do with holding on and letting go. The colour is white and the sound is weeping.

The Metal element is about value - what do we value in ourselves and in life and how do we choose what is important to hold onto. And conversely, what do we allow ourselves to let go of. In balance, the metal element has a strong connection to God/the universe/your higher self (or whatever that 'something bigger' might be for you) whilst out of balance you might feel completely cut off and also disconnected from others.

If you are predominantly a metal element 'constitution' and out of balance you might find yourself wearing a mask as you face the world and feeling that noone truly understands you. Either holding onto everything (people, possessions, money, situations etc) or unable to hold onto anything.

Events like the recent bushfire devastation prompt us all to focus on what we value in our lives - and this nearly always comes back to the people we love and who love us. The key lesson of the metal element is to reconnect with your inner self and to see the bigger picture, the natural order of the universe...

Ask yourself, what do I need or want to let go of now? Am I going to make this process difficult for myself? Or am I going to accept it as I do the flow of the seasons?

Where to start? As Louise Hay says in 'You Can Heal Your Life', the first step is a decision: 'I am willing to change.'

Why I do what I do :)

2009-03-13T13:30:00.012+11:00

18% of women aged 28 - 33 are depressed!

I read this statistic today and it really shocked me: A 'Women's Health Australia study suggests women aged 28 to 33 are in poorer mental health than their mothers or grandmothers, with almost one in five reporting a diagnosis of depression by a doctor,' (The Australian, Dec 2008).

Surprising for so many reasons ... the fact that young women are experiencing more depression than other age groups, the high proportion ... and the fact that one in five REPORT a diagnosis by a doctor ... imagine then what the true statistics could be...

The study also showed that a woman's 'stage of life influenced rates of depression, with the young dealing with new-found independence, relationships and uncertainty.'

Who can relate to that? So much choice, so much confusion!

I know from personal experience that if you visit a doctor and express concerns about feeling down you are likely to walk away with a prescription for anti-depressants. Of course this may be the best course of attack in some instances ... though I've since discovered that few fare better than a 'placebo' eg sugar pill or fake drug, in trials.

How fortunate was I that I 'happened' to have an appointment with my Kinesiologist, Amanda the next day.

By then I was in 'no choice' about being depressed and taking the anti-depressants - I 'knew' that I had to. The 'diagnosis' (dysthymia - long term low level depression) made perfect sense and I was sick of feeling down for no good reason.

I 'supposed' we might as well 'look at' the depression even though I 'knew' it wouldn't make any difference.

You can see where this is going can't you ...

After that session and another the week after ... my 'depression' cleared - that was over two years ago and I haven't had one of those 'black cloud days' since. And I don't live in fear of a depressed phase sneaking up on me as I did for many years. We got to the root of some of the issues and by clearing them 'at the time' I let go of them in the present. Imbalances in chakras, meridians, brain chemicals (neurotransmitters) and much more were also addressed.

And luckily for me (I believe) I never did get that prescription filled.

So this is why I'm here and why I do what I do :)

Can I smell brandy?

2009-02-27T15:57:00.013+11:00

Can I smell brandy?

The first time she came to Sakura Lounge, my friend Jo (in pic above!) said ... what's with the brandy in the room?? Don't worry Jo ... it's just to top up the flower essences ...!

What are Flower Essences?
Flower Essences are literally the ‘essence of a flower’. They are obtained by extracting the healing vibrational quality from the most evolved part of the plant - the flowers. They work on an emotional level, harmonising negative feelings and belief patterns held in the subconscious mind.

Where do they come from?
Flowers have been used for healing for thousands of years. Dr Edward Bach devoted his life to researching flower remedies about sixty years ago. He worked intuitively to find 38 remedies he believed would heal all conditions. He would suffer the emotional state that he needed to cure and then try various plants and flowers until he found the one single plant that could help him.

As well as using the Bach Flower Remedies, I also use the Australian Bush Flower Essences, Alaskan Desert Flower Essences and occasionally Liquid Crystal Essences.

Most people who’ve had a Kinesiology session have had the experience of having ‘their body’ choose a flower essence with exactly the right message they need at the time. It can be quite amazing!

Making the remedies
It’s quite a romantic process involving beautiful flowers, sunshine and bowls of water…!

Flowers grown under ‘perfect’ conditions are collected and without being touched directly by the individual, placed in a bowl of pure water and left in direct sun for several hours.

The flowers are then removed from the bowl, using a twig or a leaf from the same plant. The remaining flower water is then added to brandy to preserve it.

Describing Kinesiology (good luck!)

2009-02-20T12:32:00.009+11:00

A bit unclear on what Kinesiology is?

Ever struggled trying to explain it to someone else?

One of the main reasons for this is that every Kinesiology session can be quite different and there are quite a lot of Kinesiology streams focusing on different things. For example, in the video below, Fiona Chin (a Kinesiologist and Naturopath) focuses mainly on using Kinesiology to detect allergies and to assist immunity (though I'm sure she uses it more widely - maybe this was easiest to explain!) My focus tends to be more on the emotional aspects of issues people have.

Key aspects of most Kinesiology sessions would be:

Use of muscle testing to detect stress
Exploration of emotions and attitudes
Balancing stress in the body in relation to a goal or issue

One client who I've seen regularly said to me recently, 'it's so different every time it's like it's a totally different form of treatment!'

There are many reasons people might choose to see a Kinesiologist:

Stress
Anxiety
Depression
Pain
Digestive problems
Relationship issues
Ongoing illness
Feeling stuck or confused

Check out this video and see what you think: 'Kinesiology' on 9am with David and Kim

Empathy and Compassion

2009-02-11T10:42:00.002+11:00

The devastating bushfires in Victoria have brought up many emotions in all of us ...

Something helpful for me is being explored in the yoga intensive classes I'm doing this week ... to find the best qualities within ourselves that could be of some benefit in this time ... such as love, compassion, hope, generosity ... and to magnify and express these as best we can.

The events have certainly activated our sense of empathy/sympathy - the core emotions of the Earth element.

A description of the difference was explained to me this way: imagine someone has fallen in a (figurative) well ... sympathy would be expressed 'oh my goodness it looks terrible in there, I am so sorry, you must be so afraid, here let me get in with you and we'll feel awful together' ... whereas empathy is acknowledging the awfulness of the situation but saying 'here, I'll throw you a rope, I'll be here for you as you pull yourself out'. It is recognising the strength in each individual.

The earth element is represented by the colour yellow and late Summer. The sound is singing, the smell is fragrant and the taste is sweet. The organs are spleen and stomach.

The main issues for people who are predominantly Earth element are based on relationships. They tend to be enormously giving to other people and may feel their own needs are not met, leading to resentment. Earth types feel other peoples emotions very strongly - making times like this very difficult, as you may feel the pain of others almost as if it were your own. You may even blame others for how you feel, since it has such a large impact on your own feelings.

This can be hard to cope with, and a common Earth response would be to try and make other people feel better. The motivation for this is if they feel better, you will feel better. It is a form of self protection. A natural human response, in imbalance, this can be a compulsive behaviour.

If you are an Earth element type, you probably tend to think and worry a lot and find it difficult to focus on yourself and your own needs. You are probably more comfortable focusing on others.

The lesson for Earth types is to learn to nourish and nurture yourself. You are then able to give to others because you want to, not because you feel you have to.

You may feel a sense of guilt thinking of putting yourself first ... many earth elements types initially find it difficult even to think about. Realise you may even find yourself able to give more when you are feeling nourished, strong and supported yourself.

When earth is in balance and we give from a place of wanting and feeling able to give, the result is amplified and clearly felt by those who receive it. They feel empowered to act and supported to do so.

Are you going to finish strong?

2009-02-05T16:21:00.002+11:00

This is one of those amazing videos that reminds us all about our ability to choose our response to every situation...

Strokes of insight

2009-02-03T15:20:00.003+11:00

Have you every had a powerful stroke of insight? I can't say that I've had a total bolt out of the blue ... just those smaller light bulb moments.

Have you seen this 'ted' (www.ted.com) talk by Jill Bolte: My stroke of insight? She's a neuroscientist who had the amazing (horrifying?) experience of having a stroke ... and being witness to her brain shutting down bit by bit. It's sooo interesting and she is such a great speaker.

Through it she has the experience of feeling totally connected to the universe.

Here's a quote: 'I am an energy being connected to the energy all around me through the consciousness of my right hemisphere.'

Conclusion formed by the right hemisphere of the brain: 'We are perfect. We are whole. We are beautiful'.

Sounds a bit like a Kinesiology session!

Whereas the left hemisphere is all about the past and future. It thinks in language. It plans, organises, critisises, makes lists, chatters ...

The talk is all about what happens when her left hemisphere shuts down...

Feeling hot?!

2009-01-29T19:33:00.010+11:00

What a perfect time to talk about the fire element ... right in the middle of an extreme heat wave! The fire element relates to Summer ... the smell is scorched ... the colour red ... and the sound is laughing or sadness. The organs are the heart, small intestine, pericardium (heart protector) and triple heater.

The fire element is related to how we create our life. In balance, fire element people are fun, dynamic and spontaneous ... life flows and you live with passion.

Love is extremely important for people who are predominantly a fire element constitution. Having someone to love and being loved in return feels essential. This can mean your relationships are balanced, passionate and joyful. Out of balance control becomes a major issue. You could find yourself either trying to dominate or control your relationship/ partner or otherwise become extremely submissive. Either can be a form of self protection. In each case you might blame others for how you feel.

The fire element is also related to your personal identity. A fire element imbalance might mean that you are confused about your identity ... for example readily and dramatically changing opinions, hobbies, accents, behaviour or personality ... depending on your latest friends or experiences ...

However expressed, the imbalance is fundamentally internal ... and the lesson is to learn to love yourself unconditionally, connect to yourself and others and follow your heart...

What are the five elements?

2009-01-21T10:29:00.005+11:00

During any session with a Kinesiologist it is likely at some point they will refer to the 'five elements' which include fire, earth, metal, water and wood.

In Chinese Medicine the five elements relate to specific organs and muscles. Traditionally surgery and autopsies were not part of their beliefs ... as a result, the organs in Chinese Medicine refer more to the function of the organ rather than the structure.

One of the most interesting aspects of the five elements are their emotional associations and this is very important in Kinesiology. Each element relates to a number of things - a time of day, season, taste, sound, patterns ... I will go into more detail about each as the year progresses, next week starting with fire.

For now, an overview of each of the element emotions:

Fire - love, hate, control, submission, controlling others, spontaneous, joyful

Earth - empathy, sympathy, self nurture, chronic worry, unbalanced giving and receiving

Metal - self worth, grief, guilt, acknowledgement, connection, holding on, letting go, value

Water - wisdom, fear, anxiety instincts, intuition, controlling environment, driven

Wood - compassion, frustration, resentment, courage, perfectionist, timid, over-assertive

We express aspects of all five elements and we can be 'in-balance' or 'out of balance' in relation to that element. However most people will find that many of their 'issues' relate to one main element and exploring the patterns and lessons of that element can be really rewarding.

This will naturally occur as part of a Kinesiology session but be sure to ask if you have a specific interest in finding out more ..

Holiday every day!

2009-01-15T18:11:00.003+11:00

So now that most of us are back to work ... how to maintain that relaxed feeling of holidays?

Did you read the article in the Herald Sun last weekend, How to Holiday at Home? They suggest we 'stop investing so much in our annual holidays and start putting a little more into every day'.

I like it!

So, what is it that you most enjoy about your holidays ... time with friends/family, fabulous food, bushwalking, art, meeting new people, sightseeing or whatever (ok, all of it!) ... figure out what it is and try to introduce some of that every day ... or at least more regularly.

Find new galleries to visit (or maybe just flick through an art book) ... try different bars and coffee shops ... use your lunch break creatively ...

When Laurence and I were in Tassie over the new year, I LOVED the bushwalks. Now, if anyone has an idea of how to move some hills (not too high) and beautiful bushland a little closer to Melbourne I would love to hear about it!

Get into 2009!

2009-01-06T21:23:00.003+11:00

The start of 2009 sounds like a great excuse for setting some new years resolutions ... only it's fairly rare that people actually follow them through even the month of January.

Advertisers certainly pick up on the idea, if the number of weight loss company ads on tv at the moment is anything to go by!

Certainly there is value in setting goals, especially if specific strategies are put into place to ensure they can be achieved ...

But really, what is wrong with right now?

Do your new years resolutions inspire you to build on the happiness you have already achieved in your life, or do they reflect a desire to get out of the present and a deep disatisfaction with the fabulous person you already are?

Coming back to the present moment is one way to address worry or fear. As Eckhart Tolle says in 'The Power of Now',

'Ask yourself what "problem" you have right now, not next year, tomorrow or five minutes from now. What is wrong with this moment? You can always cope with the Now, but you can never cope with the future - nor do you have to. The answer, the strength, the right action or the resource will be there when you need it, not before, not after.'

What a relief it is, if we can just accept this simple concept.

Why not spend a moment, just being; right here, right now ...